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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, imported food is increasingly popular. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

A widely heated debate regarding whether the demerits of
growing
Correct article usage
the growing
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 popularity of foreign
food
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 outweigh the merits has received accumulating attention from the public. As for my perspective, I am in
favor
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favour
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 of
this
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 statement
and
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, and
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 the reasons will be thoroughly elaborated on as follows. Several reasons may lead to
why
Rephrase
apply
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the growing popularity of foreign
food
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 in some countries can result in positive effects.
Firstly
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, foreign
food
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 provides consumers with a broader range of dietary choices, which enriches their daily meals and caters to diverse tastes.
In other words
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, with the expansion of global trade, people are no longer limited to local produce and can prepare exotic dishes at home without ever leaving their own country.
Secondly
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, the availability of foreign
food
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 helps ensure a steady and sufficient
food
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 supply when the local production cannot meet the demand. Take Tainan
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for
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, for
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 example, where agricultural land is often damaged by typhoons between July and September. During
this
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 period, the local market frequently faces serious
food
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 shortages, which are largely resolved by the timely arrival of foreign products.
On the other hand
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, I believe that imported
food
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 brings more downsides to individuals and societies.
To begin
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 with, the increasing demand for imported
food
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 may pose a threat to local agriculture and traditional
food
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 industries since consumers are exposed to wider choices of
food
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.
That is
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, once imported
food
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 becomes more dominant in the market, local and small-scale producers may struggle to compete, resulting in the decline of traditional
food
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 industries and local culinary identity.
Furthermore
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, imported
food
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 causes environmental problems
due to
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 the need for transportation between countries.
According to
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 a study from National Taiwan University, carbon footprint emissions have increased by over 20% in the past five years, mainly because imported
food
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 requires extra packaging and long-distance shipping across borders. In conclusion, the adverse effects of non-local
food
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 may overwhelm the benefits because it poses a threat to the local
food
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 industries and contributes to environmental problems.

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content
Your essay has a clear plan but the view is not the same all through the piece. Choose one side and stay with it.
structure
Make the intro and conclusion match. If you say you support one view, end with that view.
coherence
Work on linking ideas. Use simple links like also, but, however, for example to tie ideas.
content
Give easy, clear examples and explain them simply to show how they prove your point.
language
Watch long sentences. Short, clear sentences help the reader.
structure
A clear plan with an intro, body, and conclusion
content
Uses a real place and a study to show points
content
Shows a compare and contrast idea by talking about good and bad sides
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