IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

in the contemporary era the ways of youth
education
Use synonyms
 has become atopic of intense public debate ,the rapid evolution of
education
Use synonyms
 patterns has brought the issue of young people learning to the forefront ,acommon perception is that students should be required to have full time at school until the adult age
while
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 others contend that the student should be free in
this
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 choice ,
this
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 essay will argue that the benefits of full time
education
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 far outweigh the drawbacks .
the
Fix capitalization
The
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 primary
rational
Use the right word
rationale
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 for advocating young people learning until 18 is that children in
this
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 age
dont
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don't
 have
ahigh
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a high
concious
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consciousness
 to make
such
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 a
dicision
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decision
,
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. This
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this
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 is largely attributable to the fact that their ideas and considerations
dont
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don't
 rely on their brains but on their hearts mostly
,to
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. To
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 illustrate the children
dont
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don't
 realise the importance of the future the whole they take care of it is the present.
Correct article usage
A asignificant
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asignificant
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significant
 drawback that must be considered is that when all
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 have a full
education
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
until 18
until18
Punctuation problem
until18,
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 we will have an
educative
Correct word choice
educational
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 generation rather,and when they reach 18 years
old
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old,
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 they decide if they want to continue or to stop,
this
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 inevitably
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
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 to
acascade
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a cascade
 of effects
including
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, including
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 building
astrong
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a strong
 and
high level
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high-level
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 community and
build
Wrong verb form
building
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astrong
Correct your spelling
a strong
 country.
in
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In
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conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
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 having weighed the evidence
it
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, it
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 is unequivocally clear that students should be required to have
full time
Use the right word
full-time
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education
Use synonyms
 until they become
an
Correct article usage
apply
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adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples

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structure
Plan your essay. Start with a short intro, then 2 or 3 body parts, then a short end. Each idea should be in one line.
task
Say what you think, then say the other side, then give a short reason why your view is best.
content
Give one or two clear and real life examples to back your reason.
language
Use plain words. Check how you spell common words and fix errors like their, there, they.
grammar
Use clear grammar and end each sentence with a full stop; use right verb form and article.
task position
Your view is clear that you want full time study.
content
You begin with the idea of debate and show some plan to argue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental cornerstone
  • literacy and numeracy
  • social inequalities
  • foundation of knowledge
  • social mobility
  • informed and engaged citizenry
  • democratic processes
  • youth crime rates
  • productive activities
  • vocational training
  • workforce
  • stifling individual talent
  • economic contribution
  • stress and mental health issues
  • unsuitable educational system
  • one-size-fits-all approach
  • diverse talents
  • career paths
  • formal academic education
  • financial strains
  • low-income countries
  • improving quality of education
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