IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

Nowadays to live or
to get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
Use synonyms
education
Correct article usage
an education
show examples
 in foreign countries is
being
Verb problem
becoming
show examples
 popular
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, while
show examples
while
Change preposition
as
show examples
 it has
own
Correct pronoun usage
its own
show examples
 benefits
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as travelling
during
Change preposition
while
show examples
 living abroad or
high
Correct word choice
a higher
show examples
 quality of
education
Use synonyms
rather
Rephrase
apply
show examples
than in
Use synonyms
home
Correct article usage
the home
show examples
country
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 it has drawbacks like some extra expenses or struggling with
language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 barrier or
Correct word choice
cultural difference
show examples
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
show examples
 of culture and
policy
Fix the agreement mistake
policies
show examples
,
Linking Words
also there might
Correct word order
there might also
show examples
 be sickness
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Use synonyms
 or absence
on
Change preposition
due to
show examples
holiday
Correct article usage
a holiday
show examples
 gathering. I am going to write about
this
Linking Words
 in my essay.
Firstly
Linking Words
, moving to another
country
Use synonyms
 was always a good idea for people who
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
tend to change something in their lives. They believe it brings happiness and useful things into their lives. Well, it can be true because emigrants might see a new sightseeing or location which
affects
Verb problem
expands
show examples
 their horizons.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there is a faith that
education
Use synonyms
 abroad is always a good choice for applicants
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it gives them a strong enough foundation to develop
further
Linking Words
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, leaving a
country
Use synonyms
 may cause several disadvantages as
expenses
Correct word choice
financial expenses
show examples
 of money, time or force to
get used
Verb problem
adapt
show examples
 to a new place and community
,
Punctuation problem
. Also
show examples
Linking Words
also
Punctuation problem
also,
show examples
 people can face culture shock or
language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 barrier if they
have
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
target knowledge.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, usually students struggle with missing their homes and relatives even if they live in the same
country
Use synonyms
, so in terms of living abroad, it should be two times
harder
Replace the word
hard
show examples
. Because it is not easy to reach a
home
Use synonyms
 in a short time or distance.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 they should be ready to miss some birthdays or holidays of their family where they used to gather and celebrate them.
Overall
Linking Words
, I want to say that living abroad is a good idea to travel or get
qualitative
Replace the word
a quality
show examples
education
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 it
also
Linking Words
 has its own drawbacks
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as expenses or sickness
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Use synonyms
, to
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 people should be ready.

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planning
Plan your essay first. Write a short plan with what you will say about good things and bad things.
structure
Make one clear idea per paragraph. Start each paragraph with a short topic sentence.
content
Add more details or simple facts to explain points.
grammar
Check grammar and use simple word order and proper articles.
coherence
Use easy linking words to join sentences: also, but, so, for example.
structure
The essay has a clear plan with intro, body and end.
coherence
There are link words like firstly, secondly, on the other hand.
content
It shows both sides of the issue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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