IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as sahara desert or the antartic. what are the benefits and disadvantages for touristic who visit places?

Nowadays,many people face the issue of
travel
Use the right word
travelling
show examples
 to most places
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
damage
Correct subject-verb agreement
damages
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Punctuation problem
them,
show examples
act
Verb problem
such as
show examples
Sahara
Correct article usage
the Sahara
show examples
desert
Fix capitalization
Desert
show examples
 or the
Antartic
Correct your spelling
Antarctic
 and
more
Fix the agreement mistake
many
show examples
 others in the world .
Firstly
Linking Words
, going
tourists
Check wording
apply
show examples
to like
as
Use the right word
a
show examples
 dangerous place
maybe
Use the right word
may
show examples
 not
crucial
Verb problem
be crucial
show examples
 for
himself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
 or
families
Correct pronoun usage
their families
show examples
 .
In other words
Linking Words
, some
persons is
Verb problem
people
show examples
 love adventure and discovering .
Also
Linking Words
, based on
study
Correct article usage
a study
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
London
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a particularly
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
manchester
Fix capitalization
Manchester University
show examples
university
Punctuation problem
university,
show examples
 it is
venture
Check wording
expected that
show examples
multiply
Replace the word
multiple
show examples
will
Check wording
problems will
show examples
do problems
Verb problem
occur
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
area
Correct article usage
the area
show examples
 of
Antartica
Correct your spelling
Antarctica
Verb problem
is to
show examples
to access very difficult
Correct word order
very difficult to access
show examples
 and
speak up
Verb problem
is very
show examples
 cold
Punctuation problem
. .for
show examples
.
Correct your spelling
For
for instance
Linking Words
, these place is better
go
Verb problem
to go
show examples
 to by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ship from
Argentine
Use the right word
Argentina
show examples
 or from through
fly
Replace the word
flying
show examples
. In
another
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
points
Check wording
words
show examples
,
touristy
Replace the word
tourists
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sometimes
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
need to travel reason of changes psychology.
For example
Linking Words
 ,some research
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
says trips to different venues
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 helping in
renewal
Replace the word
renewing
show examples
 body energy significantly .
Moreover
Linking Words
 ,more human is wanted
these
Change preposition
for these
show examples
 journeys .It is
also
Linking Words
pessiple
Correct your spelling
possible
 to say that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 they prefer
ride
Verb problem
to ride
show examples
 similar
Antartica
Correct your spelling
Antarctica
 and Sahara because mediation or repose. In conclusion,these can lead to most trips it not
ability
Correct article usage
the ability
show examples
on changing
Change preposition
to change
show examples
 the nations or look
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 life ,but a lot of
travele
Correct your spelling
travel
you
Punctuation problem
, you
show examples
 will become any person on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
earth you have
memory
Fix the agreement mistake
memories
show examples
 with family or friends after
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
a long time
so
Punctuation problem
. So
show examples
, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel
it
Punctuation problem
, it
show examples
 is possible we
knew
Wrong verb form
can know
show examples
 ourselves and
discovered
Wrong verb form
discover
show examples
 skills without
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
dependent parents.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

planning
Plan your essay before you write. Make a short plan with an intro, two body parts, and a short end.
structure
Try to keep one main idea in each paragraph. Start each body with a clear sentence that shows the point.
language
Use only simple words. Do not use long or odd phrases.
cohesion
Use linking words to show order: first, next, also, but, finally.
grammar
Check small grammar mistakes. Watch for subject-verb and article use.
content
Give clear examples that fit the idea. You can use easy facts you know.
conclusion
End with a short conclusion that restates your view.
topic
The essay is about a real travel topic.
content
The writer shows some examples like the Sahara and Antarctica.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: