IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Despite remarkable progress in agricultural productivity over the past century, global hunger persists as a paradox of modern
civilization
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civilisation
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.
This
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 issue stems from systemic failures in distribution systems, economic inequalities, and political instability rather than absolute
food
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 shortages. The primary obstacle lies in unequal access to
food
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 resources.
While
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industrialized
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industrialised
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 nations produce surplus crops, many developing regions lack
infrastructure
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the infrastructure
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 to store and transport perishable goods. In India,
for instance
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, nearly 40% of harvested fruits and vegetables rot before reaching markets
due to
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 inadequate cold storage facilities. Meanwhile, economic disparities prevent vulnerable populations from purchasing available
food
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. A family in rural Kenya might live near maize fields yet remain
food
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-insecure because they cannot afford market prices. Political conflicts exacerbate these challenges, as seen in
Yemen
Punctuation problem
Yemen,
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 where war has disrupted
food
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 supply chains despite international aid efforts. Addressing
this
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 crisis requires coordinated global action. Governments and international
organizations
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organisations
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 should invest in rural infrastructure, particularly in climate-resilient storage systems and transportation networks. The success of Brazil's school feeding program, which connects local farmers to educational institutions, demonstrates how supply chain improvements can benefit both producers and consumers. Simultaneously, wealthier nations must reform trade policies that disadvantage developing economies through unfair subsidies and export restrictions. Reducing
food
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 waste presents another critical opportunity - European nations like France have shown that supermarket donation mandates and consumer education can dramatically decrease edible
food
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 discards. Ultimately, solving world hunger demands
recognizing
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recognising
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 it as a political and logistical challenge rather than purely agricultural. By
prioritizing
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prioritising
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 equitable distribution over maximum production, humanity could realistically eliminate starvation within our lifetime.
This
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 requires sustained commitment to infrastructure development, fair trade practices, and conflict resolution - challenges that are surmountable with coordinated international effort.

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task response
Make your view clear in the first and last paragraph and restate it in a simple way.
coherence
Add more easy links to guide the reader from one idea to the next.
language
Use short and plain words so the whole text is easy to read.
task achievement
Clear answer to both parts of the task.
coherence
Good order and clear flow from problem to solution.
positive language
Real place examples help back up points.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
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