IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

some people think cities are the best plave to live. Other prefer to live in the countryside. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Its
Use the right word
It's
show examples
 often argued that living in
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
city
Use synonyms
much
Verb problem
is much
show examples
 better than in
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
, sparking a heated debate on the issue.
While
Linking Words
 some claim that
Use synonyms
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 area is the best place to live in,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 insist that
village
Correct article usage
the village
show examples
more
Verb problem
is more
show examples
 advantageous. From my point of view,
although
Linking Words
 both perspectives have merit,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 strongly believe that urban
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 can give more
opportunities
Use synonyms
 than meadowlands On the one hand, there mass of advantages to nest in rural areas.
For instance
Linking Words
, clear air and picturesque nature can significantly improve your mental and physical health. Relying on the latest
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
, agrarian region dwellers
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 longer life
span
Correct subject-verb agreement
spans
show examples
 than metropolitan inhabitants.
Moreover
Linking Words
, /
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
city
Use synonyms
 residents have more
opportunities
Use synonyms
 to reveal themselves. Metropolis
usually
Verb problem
is usually
show examples
 more financialised, making it
earier
Correct your spelling
easier
 for startups to succeed. Statistically, almost
each
Correct determiner usage
every
show examples
 big
companies
Fix the agreement mistake
company
show examples
 has started in the
city
Use synonyms
 area
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
tendency
Correct article usage
the tendency
show examples
 is obvious.
In addition
Linking Words
, downtowns provide better infrastructure and amenities that can be
Correct article usage
a determinant
show examples
determinant
Replace the word
determining
show examples
 factor for families who need nearby schools,
ambulance
Correct article usage
an ambulance
show examples
,
Correct article usage
a kid
show examples
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
show examples
 gardening service and other facilities In conclusion, both living in the countryside and in the
city
Use synonyms
 have clear advantages. Rural areas provide a peaceful environment, cleaner air, and a closer connection to nature, which can greatly benefit physical and mental health. People living in villages often enjoy a slower pace of life and less stress, making it ideal for those who value
tranquility
Change the spelling
tranquillity
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, cities offer far more
opportunities
Use synonyms
 for career growth, education, and personal development. Urban areas are better connected, have more advanced infrastructure, and provide access to essential services
such
Linking Words
 as schools, hospitals, and childcare facilities. From my perspective,
while
Linking Words
 the countryside has its charms, the range of
opportunities
Use synonyms
 and conveniences available in cities makes them a more practical and appealing choice for most people.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

planning
Make a clear plan before you write. Use a short intro, 2 body parts, and a short conclusion.
coherence
Link ideas with simple join words like 'and', 'but', 'also', 'for example', 'in addition', to show how ideas fit.
grammar
Check every sentence for grammar. Use common verb forms and simple nouns.
content
Give one clear example for each main idea, or use simple facts to back up points.
structure
The writer shows both sides and gives an opinion.
content
There are some good points about health and work chance.
task
Opinion is stated and kept through the essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: