IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts illustrate the percentage of volunteers by organizations in 2008-2014.

The pie charts illustrate the percentage of volunteers by
organizations
Change the spelling
organisations
show examples
 in 2008-2014.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 in
2008s
Punctuation problem
2008s,
show examples
 most volunteers
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
attended
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
educational
Use synonyms
organization
Use the right word
organisations
show examples
24
Punctuation problem
, 24
show examples
%. But the index had been changed in
2014
Punctuation problem
2014,
show examples
 the most common attendance was at an environmental
Use synonyms
organization
Change the spelling
organisation
show examples
. In
2008
Punctuation problem
2008,
show examples
 the
most
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
 attendance was at educational
Use synonyms
organization
Use the right word
organisations
show examples
 and environmental too 21% and 24%. The medium percentage was at an art
Use synonyms
organization
Change the spelling
organisation
show examples
 18%, others and sport
Use synonyms
organization
Use the right word
organisations
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 were the same quantity, but health care was the
lower
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 percentage
than
Change preposition
among
show examples
 others
7
Punctuation problem
, 7
show examples
%. In
2014
Punctuation problem
2014,
show examples
 all
organizations
Change the spelling
organisations
show examples
 had a change
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 environmental
Use synonyms
organization
Use the right word
organisations
show examples
 has been raised to 29%,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sport
Use synonyms
organization
Use the right word
organisations
show examples
from
Verb problem
rose from
show examples
 15% to 25%,
others
Correct word choice
and others
show examples
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
decreased from 15%
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 9%
, health
Punctuation problem
. Health
show examples
 care had been raised too
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 not
more
Change preposition
by more
show examples
 than from 7% to 8%. When it comes to the art and educational
organizations
Change the spelling
organisations
show examples
, they had fallen
down
Rephrase
apply
show examples
from 18%
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 12% and 24% to 17%. Word count 149

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words organization with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrate" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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