IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The bar chart provides an analysis of electricity generation and usage levels by the Top 10 global energy users in 2014.

the
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The
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 bar chart illustrates an analysis of
electiricity
Correct your spelling
electricity
 generation and usage levels by the top 10 global energy users in 2014.
Linking Words
overall
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Overall
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,
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china
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China
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 and
Correct article usage
the united
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united states
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United States
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 were noticeable differences between
top
Correct article usage
the top
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 10 global users.
in
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In
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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detail ,
China
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 used 5,398 billion
kWh
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 ,
United
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the United
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states
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States
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 4,009 billion
kWh
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 , Russia 1,057
kWh
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 , Japan 936.2
kWh
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 , India 871
kWh
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 , Canada 618.9
kWh
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 , France 56.2
kWh
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 , Brazil 530.7
kWh
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 , Germany 526.6
kWh
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 ,
Korea
Correct word choice
and Korea
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, Rep. 485.1
kWh
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. It is clear
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China
Correct word choice
that China
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 and
United
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the United
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states
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States
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 made up a significant proportion
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 Korea made up
relatively
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a relatively
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 smaller bar. In terms of the main
trends
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trends,
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 1 and 2 followed a similar number
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
China
Use synonyms
 still got the first rank in the consumption part too.
This
Linking Words
 county almost used 5.322 in 2014. And
also
Linking Words
 the USA was the second nation in the
using
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apply
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field of electricity
during
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usage during
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 the given year.
However
Linking Words
, all
community
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communities
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 nearly used whatever they produced bout Germany's usage, the number was higher than production.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words china, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • power
  • energy
  • generate
  • use
  • consume
  • amount
  • level
  • big
  • small
  • high
  • low
  • more
  • less
  • difference
  • gap
  • grow
  • rise
  • fall
  • stay
  • stable
  • change
  • percent
  • ratio
  • top
  • country
  • government
  • policy
  • export
  • import
  • industry
  • economy
  • population
  • need
  • supply
  • demand
  • line
  • chart
  • trend
  • pattern
  • compare
  • contrast
  • in contrast
  • similarly
  • overall
  • therefore
  • however
  • also
  • then
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