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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the number of working hours per week, in industrial sector, in four European countries in 2002. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons with relevant.

The bar charts below illustrate the number of
hours
Use synonyms
 consumed at work weekly, between four European countries in the Industrial field , within one year.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that working
hours
Use synonyms
 of 36-40
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 have the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
workers
Use synonyms
 in three of the countries listed,
whereas
Linking Words
 1-14 work
hours
Use synonyms
 have the least
percentage
Use synonyms
. Progressively, in France, the 31-35
hours
Use synonyms
 have the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
workers
Use synonyms
 at 50%,
this
Linking Words
 is seconded by 36-40
hours
Use synonyms
 at less than 40% and the minorities fall under 20% of
workers
Use synonyms
 .
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Denmark has the largest
percentage
Use synonyms
 at 70% working for 36-40hours weekly , and
this
Linking Words
 is followed by the 31-35 working
hours
Use synonyms
 allocated to about 21% of
workers
Use synonyms
.The rest of the work schedule falls under 10 per cent of
workers
Use synonyms
. In similarity to Denmark, Sweden
also
Linking Words
 has the employees working for 36-40
hours
Use synonyms
 as the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
, which is about 80%, and the minority of
workers
Use synonyms
 fall under 40 per cent.
Additionally
Linking Words
, in the UK, the highest working
hours
Use synonyms
 are the same as Sweden and Denmark, which is 36-40
hours
Use synonyms
 and have a
percentage
Use synonyms
 of 50
workers
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 the other values of working
hours
Use synonyms
 fall under 20% of employees.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, percentage, workers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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