IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The news about violent crimes may frighten people or, on the contrary, encourage them to commit a crime. Therefore, some believe that these types of news should not be reported in newspapers or on TV. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The rate at which
crimes
Use synonyms
 have been reported in the
news
Use synonyms
 has escalated in recent times. Some argue that reporting of
this
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 information on
crime
Use synonyms
 may insight fear in the citizens or motivate more
criminals
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 to commit
crime
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,
whereas
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 others are of the opinion that
this
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 type of
news
Use synonyms
 should be swept under the rug. I am of the opinion that
crimes
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 should be reported in the
news
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 , and I will discuss
concisely
Correct pronoun usage
this concisely
show examples
 in
this
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 essay. Progressively, it is imperative to alert the public to the dangers that may be lurking in the corners.
However
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,
this
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 might spike fear and terror in the minds of the people, but it provides a sense of awareness in society so that every citizen can do well to protect themselves or take safety precautions where needed. As an illustration, in a case where some violent
criminals
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 break out from their cells, it would do society good if they were informed on the
news
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 about these fleeing assailants, so that they can be aware and protect themselves by staying indoors or even reporting these
criminals
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 if they happen to spot them in their hiding places.
Furthermore
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, the report on
crimes
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 serves as a warning label to unsuspecting
criminals
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 who may want to venture into
such
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 acts of violence. More so,
due to
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 the media coverage and awareness generated from the
news
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, the situation would attract more publicity, and if need be, depending on the severity of the
crime
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,
can
Correct pronoun usage
it can
show examples
 lead to an alliance with a neighbouring country to aid in tackling the situation properly by either assisting with more firearms or foot soldiers.
For example
Linking Words
, A developing country may be faced with highly armed terrorists, but with proper publicity, they can get attention from a developed country to help handle their problems.
Hence
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,
this
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 can greatly reduce the
crime
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 Use synonyms atrocitybreachcasecorruptionevilfelonyinfractionlawlessnessmisconductmisdeed It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 you want to do the opposite for a high band score. rate in society. In conclusion, the reports about violent
crimes
Use synonyms
 may have their drawbacks, but they provide more advantages to the safety of the people in the community than not informing its citizens.

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task response
Be very clear in your view at the start of the essay. State your position in the first paragraph.
coherence
Plan the ideas in order. Each paragraph should have one main idea that links to the next.
style
Use short and straight sentences. It helps to be easy to read.
content
Give one strong example and explain how it helps your point.
grammar
Check grammar. Fix small errors and wrong word choices.
structure
Clear position is stated in the essay.
organization
Intro and ending exist with a view.
content
Some good examples are given.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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