IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, they think that other types of progress are equality important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many
governments
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 consider economic
progress
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 to be their most important goal, believing that strong economic growth leads to higher living standards.
However
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, some people argue that other forms of
progress
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,
such
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 as equality, justice and social development, are equally important for a country.
This
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 essay will discuss both views and give my own opinion. On the one hand, economic
progress
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 plays a crucial role in improving people’s lives. A strong economy allows
governments
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 to provide better public services, create job opportunities and reduce poverty.
It is clear that
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 countries with stable and developed economies tend to have a higher percentage of satisfied citizens compared to those with weak economic conditions.
Nevertheless
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, economic growth alone is not sufficient to guarantee a high quality of life. Without social stability and fair systems, financial success loses its real value.
On the other hand
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, many people believe that
governments
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 should focus equally on social
progress
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, including justice, equality, human rights and ethical values. These factors help to create a more organised, secure and meaningful society.
In addition
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, countries that fail to protect these values often struggle to achieve long-term economic success. Many international investors and global companies prefer to invest in countries where social rights and living standards are well established.
For example
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,
although
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 Saudi Arabia has launched ambitious projects to build modern cities, concerns about human rights and social freedoms have limited foreign investment. In conclusion,
while
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 economic
progress
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 is undeniably important, it should not be prioritised at the expense of social development. In my opinion,
governments
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 should give equal importance to economic growth and social values in order to ensure sustainable development and a higher quality of life for their citizens.

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task response
Plan the work. Answer all parts with a clear view. Add one or two strong examples.
coherence
Use clear link words to show how ideas fit with each other.
structure
Keep each paragraph to one main idea; end with a short tie to the idea.
examples
Bring in more real facts or clear examples to back up claims.
language
Check word and grammar to keep easy and clear meaning.
content
Two sides are shown and your own view is clear.
content
Good examples to back up points.
structure
Intro and conclusion give a full reply.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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