IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Fast food is becoming one part of life everywhere;this has bad effects on our lifestyle and diet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fast
food
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 has become an integral part of people’s daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 around the world, which has a bad impact on lifestyle and
health
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.
While
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 fast
food
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 offers some practical benefits, I strongly agree that the overconsumption of junk
food
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 has a negative effect on
overall
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 quality of life. One main reason why fast
food
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 has become so common is that it saves effort and time. In modern societies, many people have a full schedule and long working hours, which makes preparing home-cooked meals very difficult, so it is easier to grab a meal from outside.
In addition
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, the increase in fast-
food
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 outlets has provided consumers with a greater variety of meal options.
For example
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, employees and students often choose fast
food
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 because it is easily available and so affordable. Another reason to agree with
this
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 view is that fast
food
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 has harmful effects on
health
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. Most fast
food
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 meals contain a high level of fats, salt, and sugar, which can lead to serious
health
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 problems.
For instance
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, people who regularly consume fast
food
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 are more likely to suffer from obesity, heart disease, diabetes, and stomach diseases.
Therefore
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, relying on
this
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 type of
food
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 can badly affect both
health
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,
overall
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 lifestyle and cause serious problems. In conclusion,
although
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 fast
food
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 can be reliable, affordable and sometimes delicious, I believe that its negative impacts on
health
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 outweigh its benefits.
For
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this
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 reason, people should limit their consumption and try to cook their own
food
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 at home.

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task response
The answer has a clear view and good ideas. To raise the score, add more detail for each idea and give one or two extra examples.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proliferation
  • Obesity
  • Diabetes
  • Caloric intake
  • Addictive
  • Nutritional deficit
  • Culinary traditions
  • Healthcare expenditure
  • Immediate gratification
  • Lifestyle diseases
  • Homogenization
  • Processed foods
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