IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that studying History is very important. Others say that it is irrelevant and has many limitations and should not be studied at all. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent times, there
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 been a debate on the importance of studying certain subjects. Some individuals believe that learning
History
Use synonyms
 is paramount,
whereas
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 others think it holds no value and limits the mind. In
this
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 essay,
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 will discuss both views and give my opinion. On the one hand,
history
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 is a very interesting subject that enlightens us about our core values
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such
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, such
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 as
,
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apply
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 our culture, our historical achievements and
also
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 our language at large.
Hence
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, in
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
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 of
this
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 subject
beign
Correct your spelling
being
 studied in a school's curriculum, it deprives us of truly understanding our origin. As an illustration, students who are
well grounded
Use the right word
well-grounded
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 in their culture or historical background are more confident when addressing issues related to historical events.
On the other hand
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,
this
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 subject can present itself with details that may seem to be
controversial
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controversial,
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 given
different
Correct article usage
the different
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 beliefs of certain people.
For example
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, some cultural practices which are considered to be abominable in the modern world should not be discussed in schools. More so, some historical events may be interpreted differently from the way others believe
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 to be,
thus
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,
this
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 encourages a false narrative on certain groups of people.
For instance
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, dating back to the civil war in Nigeria, some tribes are of the narrative that the
Igbo's
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Igbo
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ochestrated
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orchestrated
 the coup,
whereas
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 they believe it was the Yoruba's.
Hence
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,
this
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 fosters a generational
fued
Correct your spelling
feud
 between both tribes. In
conclussion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, it is of great importance for one to be educated about their
history
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,
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;
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therefore
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, I am of the opinion that we should study our
history
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, but we should be critical
with
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of
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 information
that is
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 not backed up with proper evidence.

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grammar
Fix many spelling and grammar errors that hide meaning.
structure
Make the intro clear: say what is discussed and state your view.
content
Give clear and full ideas for each view, with a simple example.
coherence
Use more linking words to show how ideas connect.
lexical
Use only common words; avoid long and rare words.
tone
Clear view is given at the end.
structure
Two parts show both sides.
content
The plan is present: intro, two views, conclusion.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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