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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that it is possible for a country to be economically successful and have a clean environment. Others argue that these two objectives are not compatible. Discuss both the views and give your opinion

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Some people believe that a
country
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 can achieve
both
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 economic success and a clean
environment
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,
while
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 others argue that these two goals are incompatible.
This
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 essay will discuss
both
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 views before explaining why I agree that they can be compatible with the right policies and
technology
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. On the one hand, those who say economic growth and environmental protection cannot go together point to historical examples. During the Industrial Revolution,
countries
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 became wealthy by burning coal and building factories, but
this
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 caused severe air and water
pollution
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. More recently, China and India have lifted millions of people out of poverty by prioritising industrial development over environmental concerns. From
this
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 perspective, imposing strict environmental regulations on developing
countries
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 would make it harder for them to compete with richer nations that have already grown prosperous through polluting activities.
Furthermore
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, some industries
such
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 as coal mining, oil production, and intensive farming are naturally harmful to the
environment
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, yet they provide millions of jobs and contribute significantly to national economies.
Therefore
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, critics argue that forcing these sectors to become green would cost jobs and slow down economic progress.
On the other hand
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, there is growing evidence that economic success and a clean
environment
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 can actually support each other.
Countries
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 like Sweden, Germany, and Costa Rica have shown that it is possible to have high living standards
while
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also
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 protecting nature. Sweden,
for example
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, has reduced its carbon emissions significantly
while
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 maintaining a strong economy, largely by investing in renewable energy
such
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 as wind and solar power.
Similarly
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, Costa Rica generates almost all of its electricity from clean sources and has become a popular destination for ecotourism, which brings money into the
country
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.
In addition
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,
pollution
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 causes serious damage that eventually hurts the economy. Air
pollution
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 leads to health problems, which increase healthcare costs and reduce workers' productivity. Climate change causes floods, storms, and crop failures, all of which are extremely expensive to deal with. Given these facts, protecting the
environment
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 is actually a smart economic decision in the long run. In my opinion, the two objectives are certainly compatible, but
this
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 depends on how a
country
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 goes about achieving them. I agree that in the past,
countries
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 often had to choose between growth and a clean
environment
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 because clean
technology
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 did not exist or was too expensive.
However
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,
this
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 is no longer true. Renewable energy has become cheaper than coal and gas in many parts of the world. Electric cars are becoming more affordable, and new farming methods can reduce
pollution
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 without reducing food production. That said, I
also
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 believe that poorer
countries
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 may need help from richer nations to make the green transition, because investing in clean
technology
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 requires money that they may not have. With international cooperation and sensible government policies,
such
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 as taxing
pollution
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 and supporting green innovation, any
country
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 can pursue
both
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 economic prosperity and environmental sustainability. In conclusion,
while
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 there are valid concerns that environmental protection might slow economic growth, I believe that these two goals are not fundamentally opposed. With modern
technology
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, smart investment, and political will, nations can achieve
both
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 a successful economy and a clean
environment
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. Indeed, protecting the planet is one of the best investments a
country
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 can make for its own future.

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task response
For task response, your view is clear and you answer all parts. To get a higher score, add one more short point about why some poor countries still find this hard today.
task response
For task response, your ideas are strong, but one or two points could be a bit more fully explained.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow and each paragraph has one main idea. To improve more, use a few shorter linking phrases too, not only long ones.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some sentences are quite long. A few shorter sentences would make your ideas even clearer.
task response
For task response, you discuss both sides and give your own view clearly.
task response
For task response, you use good examples like Sweden, Costa Rica, China, and India.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, linking words like On the one hand, On the other hand, Furthermore, and In conclusion help the flow.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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