IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In some countries, facial recognition and vein pattern recognition are gaining in popularity in biometric security. Is this positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

In contemporary society, the question of whether
biometric
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security
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technologies
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 should be prioritised over traditional
security
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methods
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 has generated considerable debate.
This
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 issue is particularly relevant today because digital threats and
identity
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 fraud are becoming increasingly common.
While
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 some individuals argue that
biometric
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security
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technologies
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 bring clear advantages, others contend that traditional
security
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methods
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 are more reliable.
This
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 essay will examine both perspectives before presenting a clear conclusion. On the one hand, there are several compelling reasons why
biometric
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security
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technologies
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 are widely supported. The primary argument is that they enhance
security
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 accuracy, which directly contributes to
identity
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 protection.
For example
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, in many countries, facial recognition
systems
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 have demonstrated that even small improvements in authentication can lead to significant reductions in unauthorised access. Another important point is that
biometric
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systems
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 improve efficiency, allowing individuals to access secure services more quickly and conveniently.
As a result
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, societies that emphasise
biometric
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security
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 often experience greater public safety, which is difficult to achieve through password-based
systems
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 alone.
On the other hand
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, critics argue that traditional
security
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methods
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 should not be overlooked. One major concern is that excessive reliance on
biometric
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technologies
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 can result in privacy violations, negatively affecting personal freedom.
Additionally
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, opponents believe that
such
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systems
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 increase the risk of data misuse, which is essential to consider for long-term public trust.
For instance
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, when
biometric
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 data is stored improperly, it can lead to
security
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 breaches and encourage
identity
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 theft, leading to serious consequences for individuals. In my opinion,
although
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 both views have merit, I firmly believe that
biometric
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security
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 is a positive development.
This
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 is because it strengthens protection
while
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 addressing the weaknesses of traditional
security
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methods
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. If governments and organisations implement strong data regulations, they are more likely to achieve secure and efficient
systems
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 in a responsible manner. In conclusion, the growing use of facial and vein pattern recognition reflects broader concerns about digital
security
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 in modern societies. By adopting these
technologies
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 carefully and ethically, countries can move forward and ensure safer
identity
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 protection for future generations.

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task
The essay has many good points and a clear line. Try to add more strong proof or numbers to back up claims.
coherence
Each paragraph should have one main idea with a clear opening line that states it.
language
Use mostly simple words and short lines to keep ideas easy to read.
structure
The view is clear at the end, so the reader sees your point.
coherence
Link words like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' support flow well.
structure
The essay keeps a good plan: intro, two body parts, and a finish.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biometric security
  • identity theft
  • authentication processes
  • user experience
  • mobile banking
  • airport security
  • workplace access
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • government surveillance
  • accessibility issues
  • discrimination
  • initial setup and maintenance
  • developing countries
  • ethical considerations
  • consent
  • data ownership
  • regulations and guidelines
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