Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, howevr, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Numerous
amount
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number
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of people assume that older
ones
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with authority in
Correct article usage
the familiy
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familiy
Correct your spelling
family
must teach
little
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the younger
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ones
Use synonyms
how to become
a
Correct article usage
apply
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better
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
for society.
On the other hand
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, others
relly
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rely
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on schools for
this
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mission.
In
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On
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this
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occasion
Add a comma
occasion,
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I believe that
childeren
Correct your spelling
children
must be educated in both ways equally . Schools and colleges are really nicely planned environments for education.
However
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, it is only suitable to teach scientific majors like maths, physics and biology. In
soome
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some
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
there are special lessons that
are aiming
Wrong verb form
aim
show examples
to create better members of
Correct article usage
the communitiy
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communitiy
Correct your spelling
community
. These classes are really nicely built
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however
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; however
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, it is a really
time consuming
Use the right word
time-consuming
show examples
process to teach both.
Also
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, the school times are not as much as the time spent
in
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at
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house
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home
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in
comparission
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comparison
.
In addition
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, students may not feel the best and comfortable in talking
these
Change preposition
about these
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kinds of
topicks
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topics
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with their teachers in front of their friends.
On the other hand
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, sensitive
sopics
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topics
like
this
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must be
only considered
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considered only
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in
house
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a house
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environment
ony
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apply
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. The main reason behind
this
Linking Words
is that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
parents are more like a safe spot for kids.
Scientificaly
Correct your spelling
Scientifically
, kids are more likely to reflect their thoughts transparently in front of
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
close
ones
Use synonyms
.
According to
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that, my opinion would be to
teaching
Wrong verb form
teach
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childeren
Correct your spelling
children
at home for better manners. Nowadays,
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
siriously
Correct your spelling
seriously
hard to find people who help their old
ones
Use synonyms
.
This
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kind of behaviour should be
emphosed
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emphasised
by parents, not
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
. In conclusion, it is hard for colleges to provide both
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
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at the same time.
This
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will
coase
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cause
more school hours for students. Which is really stressful for stuff and kids.

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task response
Plan your essay well before you write. State your view in the intro and keep to it.
task response
Give one idea per paragraph for each view, with a simple example to show your point.
coherence cohesion
Use more connect words to join ideas, such as first, also, but, and finally.
content
There is an attempt to discuss both sides and to give an opinion.
structure
There is an intro and a conclusion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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