IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a “gap year”; before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to a broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

there
Verb problem
They are not
show examples
nodenying
Correct your spelling
denying
 the fact that some groups of individuals
quite
Verb problem
are quite
show examples
 into taking a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 and
discover
Wrong verb form
discovering
show examples
 life.
While
Linking Words
 it is widely held
belief
Check wording
apply
show examples
that others are arguing
about
Punctuation problem
about,
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 they cannot accept that decision since it
wasting
Wrong verb form
wastes
show examples
 time
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 their perspective. Is essay will discuss
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, the first group
thinking
Wrong verb form
thinks
show examples
 that they are taking a breath far away from all that stress which was on their shoulders for a long time.
In other words
Linking Words
, during that time they select what
will they
Correct word order
they will
show examples
 do in future,
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 they
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
 want to
regreat
Correct your spelling
regret
 later when they get old.
In addition
Linking Words
,
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 to new countries
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 them
charging
Wrong verb form
charge
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themselfs
Correct your spelling
themselves
, and
preparing
Wrong verb form
prepares them
show examples
 for tomorrow and
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new relationships with others,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 might assist them and enhance their experience.
For example
Linking Words
, the USA students tend to take a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 more
significant
Replace the word
significantly
show examples
 for them than any registration to any
estbalish
Correct your spelling
establishment
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some individuals who disagree with taking
Use synonyms
gap
Correct article usage
a gap
show examples
Use synonyms
year
Punctuation problem
year,
show examples
 they see it as a weak way to leave your responsibilities
behinde
Correct your spelling
behind
 your back.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they
maybe
Use the right word
may be
show examples
 facing any issues
could
Correct pronoun usage
that could
show examples
running
Wrong verb form
run
show examples
 their whole life.
For instance
Linking Words
, some studies find that the Chinese students who have
took
Wrong verb form
taken
show examples
 a
gap
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 become
more lazy
Correct word choice
lazier
show examples
, and maybe useless in their work. In conclusion, despite other people
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 different
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
, I tend to strongly agree with people who disagree with
Use synonyms
gap
Correct article usage
the gap
show examples
year
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Your answer covers both sides and gives an opinion, but the reasons are not clear or well explained. Start with a clear statement of your view in the intro and end with a firm conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple, clear link words and topic sentences. Each paragraph should have one main idea that relates to the question.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Use short, direct sentences. Avoid long, mixed ideas.
structure and planning
Plan your essay before writing: decide your position, outline two or three reasons, and pick one example for each.
content
Give specific and clear examples to back up your points. Do not rely only on general statements.
task response
The essay shows an attempt to discuss both sides of the issue.
coherence
There is an introduction, body paragraphs and a conclusion.
content
There are some examples mentioned (USA and Chinese students).
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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