IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in a group while others believe thvat it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

There is a debate over whether teamwork or individual work is beneficial for
students
Use synonyms
. I agree with those who
study
Use synonyms
 with a group, because it guarantees that it will eventually end with success.
This
Linking Words
 essay will explore two views and give my opinion. Nowadays, self-
study
Use synonyms
became
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
 widespread among learners as most
people
Use synonyms
 encourage them to achieve their goals by themselves. Social media influencers encourage
students
Use synonyms
 to
study
Use synonyms
 alone. It seems aesthetic or kind of comfortable for individuals who are introverted. Introverted
people
Use synonyms
 are extremely shy and do not prefer
be
Verb problem
to be
show examples
 with someone else.
For example
Linking Words
,
students
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 who are in that type rarely do they join to team or not,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
 still prefer to be alone. Because of shyness or thinking overwhelmingly about
others
Check wording
others'
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
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 would not let them
study
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
group
Correct article usage
a group
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. Yet, most
people
Use synonyms
 achieved a lot of
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 with their strength by focusing on their task only without any distractions,
such
Linking Words
 as entertainment or chatting with peers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of individuals still prefer to be with their team, including friends. If
people
Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
 together, they are likely to compete with each other. Competition plays a key role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 achievement.
Scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
Scientists
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 believe that if
people
Use synonyms
 compete together, they will be more proactive and attentive.
This
Linking Words
 is led by a
hug
Use the right word
huge
show examples
 self-development through a game or arrangement. Another key reason why collaboration is especially important is that
students
Use synonyms
 will share their knowledge
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 each other. Numerous
people
Use synonyms
 reckon that discussion or chit-chatting is excessive for learners, yet it is not actually true, for they share their perception and
idea
Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 partner, whether it is related to their educational topic or globally, it doesn’t matter, still they broaden their horizons
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the way

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structure
Make a clear plan before you write. Start with a short note of the two sides, then say your view. Use one idea per paragraph.
structure
Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph. Start with a main idea and then add how and why.
examples
Use simple and true examples. Give one or two exact cases that show your point.
grammar
Check grammar and word use. Fix mistakes like scientists vs scientist, and wrong form after 'be'.
content
The essay looks at both sides and gives a view of its own.
content
The idea of group work is explained as a benefit.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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