Fossil fuel, such as coal, oil and natural gas, is extensively used in many countries which cause harms to the environment. The use of alternative sources of energy, including wind power, however, is being encouraged in many countries. Is this a positive or negative development?

Using non-renewable
energy
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sources
such
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as coal, oil and natural gas has become increasingly popular in recent years.
While
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such
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energy
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can cause a negative impact on the environment, many countries are implementing sustainable
energy
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, particularly
wind
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power
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.
This
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essay will discuss about significant improvement of using
wind
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energy
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as a replacement for traditional
energy
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.
To begin
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with,
wind
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-based
energy
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systems can reduce the impact on the environment. Unlike conventional
energy
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sources,
wind
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energy
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can be derived from natural
wind
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power
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.
As a result
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,
this
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can reduce greenhouse gas emissions, which is the main reason for global warming and air pollution facing the earth these days.
In addition
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,
wind
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power
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is
also
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a greener alternative source of
energy
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because it is renewable and clean
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apply
show examples
energy
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.
For instance
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,
wind
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turbines can generate large-scale
power
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, which is naturally occurring and unlimited without polluting the environment.
Therefore
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,
wind
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energy
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is an efficient and sustainable development compared to conventional
energy
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.
Moreover
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,
wind
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turbine-generated electricity with technological advancements has become more efficient, resulting in lower cost, unlike other
energy
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.
For example
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,
wind
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electricity can lower pollution-related costs for governments.
Furthermore
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, when compared to carbon-based
power
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plants,
wind
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energy
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can mitigate the maintenance cost, leading to financial benefits in the long run. In conclusion, it is undeniable that traditional fuel-based
energy
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is the main cause of climate change and environmental degradation.
Accordingly
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, the governments and society should prioritise the development of renewable
wind
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energy
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.

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improvement
Your view on wind energy is clear, but the plan to show how wind handles all work could be stronger. Add a line to show you think wind power is good and say why now.
improvement
Use more clear links between ideas. Simple words like and, but, so, also help join thoughts.
improvement
Fix grammar in some spots. For example, 'This essay will discuss about' is not right; use 'This essay will look at' or 'This essay will discuss'. Keep short, clear sentences.
improvement
The body has good points on air, cost and work. Add one more real example or fact to back your claim.
strength
Clear view that wind energy can help cut pollution and save cost in the long run
strength
Good use of linking words like 'Moreover' and 'Furthermore' to add ideas
strength
The ending asks for action and shows a plan for the future
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fossil fuels
  • Renewable energy
  • Carbon footprint
  • Global warming
  • Sustainability
  • Energy security
  • Economic development
  • Technological advancement
  • Energy independence
  • Infrastructure investment
  • Intermittent supply
  • Storage technology
  • Public acceptance
  • Renewable energy sector
  • National security
  • Research and innovation
  • Viable energy sources
  • Upfront investment
  • Environmental impact
  • Carbon emissions
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