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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph below shows internet users as percentage of population in three different countries.

The provided line graph illustrates the proportion of individuals using the internet in three different countries (the
USA
Use synonyms
,
MEXICO
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 and
CANADA
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) over a decade from 1999 to 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
inernet
Correct your spelling
internet
 usage increased in all three nations, with
CANADA
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experienced
Wrong verb form
experiencing
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 a dramatic growth over the period to become the leader,
whereas
Linking Words
MEXICO
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 remained the lowest throughout the period. In 1999, the internet penetration
rate
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 in the
USA
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 and
CANADA
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were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 almost 20% and 10% respectively.
The
Correct article usage
apply
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CANADA
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's
rate
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 increased sharply until it outraced the
USA
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 at around 45% and continued rising to 60% in 2003.
Then
Linking Words
 it rocketed and reached the peak at almost 100% in 2015.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the
USA
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rate
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 grew to 40% in 2001. After that, the percentage of the population online in the
USA
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 has fluctuated between 2001 and 2005. It continued to climb until it reached its highest point at around 80% in 2009.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
MEXICO
Use synonyms
's
rate
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 started at nearly 5% and
then
Linking Words
 it rose slightly to about 10% in 2001.
Then
Linking Words
 the
rate
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 of using the internet in
MEXICO
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 saw a considerable upward trend over the next years
at
Punctuation problem
, at
show examples
 40% in 2009.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words usa, mexico, canada, rate with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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