Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin,, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Some people are of the opinion that a person's
culture
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is determined by their country of origin,
while
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others think that
has
Correct pronoun usage
it has
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only a marginal influence. From my perspective person's
culture
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is defined by their country. First and foremost,
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
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traditions
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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established by minor influence. When influential people make a minor impact, they may feel a sense of accomplishment
while
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gradually contributing to larger changes in society.
As a result
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, their efforts can inspire others to take action, creating a ripple effect that leads to meaningful improvements
over
Rephrase
apply
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.
For example
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, more and more people in India have developed their
culture
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through minor influences, which has led to a diverse and vibrant society that embraces a variety of traditions and customs.
On the other hand
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, residents’
culture
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is largely determined by their country of origin, as national traditions, language, and social norms shape their daily
behavior
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behaviour
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and influence their values and beliefs.

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task response
Make your view clear. State your main point in the intro and stick to it in all paragraphs.
coherence
Give two to three strong ideas for each side. Use clear links to show the flow from one idea to the next.
grammar
Fix grammar and word order. Use simple, short sentences to avoid mistakes.
lexical
Choose common words. Avoid hard or long phrases. Use exact examples that fit.
structure
Plan the essay: intro, body 1, body 2, conclusion. Keep a clear line of thought.
content
The writer tries to discuss both sides of the issue.
example
An example about culture and origin is used.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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