IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people advocate the death penalty for those who committed violent crimes. Others say that capital punishment is unacceptable in contemporary society.Describe the advantages and disadvantages of the death penalty and give your opinion.

The use of
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
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penalty
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 for violent offenders remains one of the most controversial issues in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
 criminal
justice
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 system.
While
Linking Words
 some argue that capital
punishment
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 serves as
necessary
Correct article usage
a necessary
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 deterrent and delivers
justice
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 to the victim, others contend that it is inhumane and incompatible with contemporary values.
Although
Linking Words
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
penalty
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 may offer certain perceived benefits, I believe its disadvantages
outweighs
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweigh
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 its advantages in today's society. One of the main arguments in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
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 of capital
punishment
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 is its potential deterrent effect. Supporters claim that the possibility of execution discourages individuals from committing severe crimes
such
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 as murder or terrorism.
In addition
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, some believe that the
death
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penalty
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 ensures
justice
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 by providing a sense of closure for victims’ families.
However
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, there are significant drawbacks associated with the
death
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penalty
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. The most serious concern is the possibility of wrongful convictions. Judicial systems, no matter how advanced, are not infallible. If an innocent person is executed, the mistake is irreversible.
Moreover
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, critics argue that capital
punishment
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 violates fundamental human rights, particularly the right to life. In many contemporary societies,
justice
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 systems are increasingly focused on rehabilitation rather than retribution. Executions
also
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 raise ethical concerns regarding state-sanctioned killing, which some view as contradicting the moral principle that violence should not be met with
further
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 violence. In my view,
while
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 the desire for
justice
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 in cases of violent crime is entirely understandable, capital
punishment
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 is not an appropriate response in modern society. Life imprisonment without parole can ensure public safety without risking irreversible judicial errors. A
justice
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 system should
prioritize
Change the spelling
prioritise
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 fairness, human dignity, and
a
Correct article usage
the
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 possibility of reform,
however
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 rare that may be. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 the
death
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penalty
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 is supported for its perceived deterrent effect and retributive
justice
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, its ethical implications and the risk of wrongful execution make it deeply problematic.
Therefore
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, I believe that capital
punishment
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 should not have a place in contemporary criminal
justice
Use synonyms
 systems.

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coherence
Make each paragraph have one main idea that links to your view.
grammar
Fix small grammar. For example, 'outweigh' not 'outweighs' with plural subject.
task response
Add a bit more facts or real examples to show how the policy works in real life.
coherence
Use simple connect words to show how ideas are linked.
task response
Clear view and conclusion.
coherence
Good layout with intro, body, and conclusion.
tone
Calm and respectful tone when arguing.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advocates
  • Capital punishment
  • Contemporary society
  • Violent crimes
  • Deterrence
  • Retribution
  • Cost-effectiveness
  • Imprisonment
  • Innocent
  • Unethical
  • Inhumane
  • Misuse
  • Legal systems
  • Heinous crimes
  • Closure
  • Moral concerns
What to do next:
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