the bar chart below shows the top ten countrie for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014.

The bar chart
illustrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrates
show examples
the amount of electricity
power
Check wording
apply
show examples
produced and consumed by the top countries in the world in 2014.
Units
Use synonyms
are measured in
kHw
Correct your spelling
kWh
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
China
Use synonyms
held
lead
Correct article usage
the lead
show examples
possition
Correct your spelling
position
with the largest
production
Use synonyms
and consumption
energy
Change preposition
of energy
show examples
power. Following
China
Use synonyms
, the USA was in second rank
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
which
Correct word choice
where
show examples
suply
Correct your spelling
supply
and demand for energy
trypled
Correct your spelling
tripled
compared to third in the rank
Russia
Punctuation problem
, Russia
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
there are other top countries that generation and usage of electrical energy less than thousand of miilion
units
Use synonyms
.
China
Use synonyms
stoot
Correct your spelling
stood
out as a leading nation with
production
Use synonyms
and consumption figures reaching nearly 5,400
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
producing
Punctuation problem
, producing
show examples
roughly 4,100
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of electricity
show examples
electricity
Punctuation problem
electricity,
show examples
the USA lead
second
Change preposition
in second
show examples
place, which
lower
Verb problem
is lower
show examples
than
China
Use synonyms
but significantly higher than
third
Correct article usage
the third
show examples
country.
However
Linking Words
, Russia
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
its
production
Use synonyms
of 1,057
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
and usage of 1,038
billion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
, held their third place in rank.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the middle group of remaining nations had much lower figures, all falling around or below the 1,000
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
mark. Like countries Japan, India, Canada, France, Brazil, Germany, Korea republic
production
Use synonyms
and consumption electro power began with 449.5
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
to 936.2
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Germany is the only country that consumed slightly more electricity (582.5
billion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
) than it produced (5266
billion
Use synonyms
units
Use synonyms
).

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
Vocabulary: Replace the words units, china, production, billion, kwh with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • gigawatt hours (GWh)
  • renewable energy sources
  • non-renewable energy sources
  • industrialization
  • economic activities
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainability
  • energy efficiency
  • power generation
  • grid capacity
  • energy policies
  • consumption patterns
  • energy demand
  • production-consumption disparity
  • environmental impact
  • greenhouse gas emissions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: