Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money making traditions aimed at tourists. Others,however,believe that it is the only way to save these traditions.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Views Against
Commercialization
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of Cultural
Traditions
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Authenticity Dilution: Critics argue that when cultural
practices
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are marketed for profit, their authenticity tends to suffer.
Traditions
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may become overly commercialized and tailored to meet the expectations of
tourists
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, stripping them of their original meaning and significance. Cultural Exploitation: There is a concern that
commercialization
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can lead to exploitation. Communities may feel pressured to alter their
traditions
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to appeal to
tourists
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, resulting in a loss of genuine cultural expression and identity. Short-term Gains vs. Long-term Sustainability: Financial incentives might provide short-term economic benefits, but the long-term sustainability of cultural
practices
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can be jeopardized. Once
traditions
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are commodified, they risk becoming mere spectacles rather than living
practices
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that continue to evolve within the community. Views Supporting
Commercialization
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Economic Support: Proponents argue that tourism can provide crucial funding that helps preserve
traditions
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. The income generated from
tourists
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can be reinvested into the community, allowing for the maintenance of cultural sites, festivals, and traditional crafts. Increased Awareness: Commercializing cultural
traditions
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can raise awareness among a broader audience.
This
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exposure might foster appreciation and respect for the culture, potentially leading to a renewed interest in preserving and practicing these
traditions
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. Adaptation and Evolution: Supporters believe that culture is not static; it evolves over time. By embracing tourism, communities can adapt their
traditions
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to fit contemporary contexts
while
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still maintaining their core values and significance. Personal Opinion In my view, a balanced approach is necessary.
While
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commercialization
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can pose risks to cultural authenticity, it can
also
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provide essential resources for preservation and adaptation. Communities should have agency over how their
traditions
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are represented and marketed. Engaging with
tourists
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in a way that emphasizes education and respectful sharing can help maintain the integrity of cultural
practices
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while
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also
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benefiting economically. Exploring forms of tourism that prioritize local voices and sustainable
practices
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may be a way to harmonize economic benefits with cultural preservation.

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structure
Add a short opening paragraph that says what you will cover and a short ending to sum up your view.
coherence
Use clear link words like and, but, also, however to show how ideas fit together.
content
Give one or two concrete examples to back up points, even simple facts.
content
Make ideas stronger with a bit more detail and a clear point for each paragraph.
strength
The essay looks at both sides and gives a view of your own.
structure
There is a clear division of ideas with sections about each side.
strength
It shows care to the topic and aim to teach about the issue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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