In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What problems is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this situation?

Festivals are
roots
Correct article usage
the roots
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of any
contry
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country
and
culture
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as well. In
modern
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the modern
show examples
period
Punctuation problem
period,
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people forget their traditional festivals. It is
major
Correct article usage
a major
show examples
concern to save the tradition and cultural values. I discussed below regarding problems why
this
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happening
Verb problem
is happening
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and
also
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write
Wrong verb form
wrote
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about solutions to tackle
this
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kind of situation. To
inaugurate
Verb problem
begin
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with,
In
Fix capitalization
in
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modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
period
Punctuation problem
period,
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people
are
Verb problem
have
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start
Wrong verb form
started
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spending their
time
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with technology. Owing to
this
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, in
pervious
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previous
show examples
years
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childrens
Correct your spelling
children
celebrate the functions
by
Change preposition
apply
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together. They visit their
friends
Check wording
friend's
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house and share the sweets and their views.
However
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,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days they have small families, nobody
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
more
time
Use synonyms
to spend with their
Use synonyms
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
to
taught
Wrong verb form
teach them
show examples
about festival importance because both parents are working nowadays and they have hectic schedules.
Moreover
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, pupils like to spend their
time
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with technology gadgets
instead
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of playing with their family and friends.
This
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is
Verb problem
apply
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also
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makes
major
Correct article usage
a major
show examples
impact on children.
Before
Punctuation problem
Before,
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they
are
Wrong verb form
were
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not used to mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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and
laptops
Punctuation problem
laptops,
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they
preffer
Correct your spelling
preferred
playing with others
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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they celebrate functions together and learn about
festival
Fix the agreement mistake
festivals
show examples
and
culture
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. On the
otherside
Correct your spelling
other side
, to tackle
this
Linking Words
issue government should spend more money and
time
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. They need to
held
Wrong verb form
hold
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a cultural
fuction
Correct your spelling
function
in
city
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the city
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so everyone
came
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can come
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their
Use the right word
there
show examples
and
clebrate
Correct your spelling
celebrate
together.
A part
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Apart
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from
this
Linking Words
government should
held
Wrong verb form
hold
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campaign
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a campaign
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by
Change preposition
from
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city to city.
Linking Words
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
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educational
insitite
Correct your spelling
institutions
are
also
Linking Words
responsible
to share
Change preposition
for sharing
show examples
the awareness about our
culture
Use synonyms
and festivals. They need to organise small functions in their facilities to aware the
Use synonyms
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
.
Least
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Last
show examples
not
Correct word choice
but not
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at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Linking Words
last
Use the right word
least
show examples
, parents should be responsible for
their
Verb problem
teaching their
show examples
Use synonyms
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
to teach about our
culture
Use synonyms
,
festival
Fix the agreement mistake
festivals
show examples
and traditions as well. So, pupils never get away from their roots. In conclusion,
although
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
technology changes the way of living in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
era. People start
forget
Wrong verb form
forgetting
show examples
about their
traditional
Replace the word
traditions
show examples
and
festival
Fix the agreement mistake
festivals
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, government and parents should be responsible about
awreness
Correct your spelling
awareness
in the community.

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task response
Plan a clear start, middle, and end. Write a short intro that says what you will talk about. End with a short conclusion.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas. Start each paragraph with a word like First, Next, Also, Finally. This helps the flow.
task response
Give more real examples or details to show how the problem happens and how to fix it.
language use
Check spelling and grammar. Fix common errors such as festival, children, campaign.
language use
Keep sentences simple and clear. Do not repeat the same idea.
content
The essay talks about both problems and solutions.
content
It mentions the roles of government, schools, and parents.
structure
There is some paragraph structure and basic flow.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • traditional festivals
  • heritage
  • cultural identity
  • folklore
  • cultural tourism
  • intergenerational
  • homogenization
  • commercialization
  • intangible cultural heritage
  • community engagement
  • awareness
  • revitalize
  • cultural diversity
  • educational programs
  • governmental support
  • logistical support
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