IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that it's a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it's important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In
this
Linking Words
 modern world, some people believe that it is a great moment to socialise with coworkers after work,
while
Linking Words
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
folks
Check wording
apply
show examples
hold the view that it is not necessary to see colleagues
out
Change preposition
outside
show examples
 of
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss each perspective and give my opinion. On the one hand,
although
Linking Words
 some people refuse to stay with colleagues after work, there are some specific advantages
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 it. Generally, the best friends we made are from school or college,
this
Linking Words
 is because we were protected by educators
while
Linking Words
 being
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
; To be more specific, teachers can control issues and filter classmates to ensure a safe environment for us. Once we
gradute
Correct your spelling
graduate
 from campus
then
Linking Words
 start working, it is hard to find a real friend, as we need to keep a distance to protect ourselves.
However
Linking Words
, if we are willing to see each colleague as a friend
instead
Linking Words
 of
work
Correct article usage
a work
show examples
 partner, that will be a great opportunity to
meet
Verb problem
make
show examples
 a match fellow.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is believed that social
life
Use synonyms
 and working
life
Use synonyms
 must be separated. Some people value the personal private moment, which
calls
Wrong verb form
is called
show examples
 "me time".
This
Linking Words
 is a tendency in modern society, especially for
youth
Correct article usage
the youth
show examples
 generation, because most of them do not have
family
Correct article usage
a family
show examples
;
In other words
Linking Words
,
socializing
Change the spelling
socialising
show examples
 with coworkers
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
occupies their
own
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
time for relaxing or learning new things. In conclusion, I personally believe that
keep
Wrong verb form
keeping
show examples
 socialising with colleagues is beneficial for our
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Making friends is important for all of us; In my view, there is no forever friendship, and no one can accompany us whole
life
Use synonyms
.
Becasue
Correct your spelling
Because
 of these reasons, it is worth
for
Correct pronoun usage
it for
show examples
 us to keep finding a chance to make friends.

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task
Make sure you answer the task. Say both views clearly and give your own view.
content
Add more detail for each side with simple examples that relate to work life.
coherence
Link ideas with easy words like also, but, and then to show how one idea leads to the next.
structure
Clear plan with an intro, two sides, and a conclusion.
content
Your own view is stated.
language
Uses some good contrast phrases (on the one hand / on the other hand).
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • colleagues
  • socialising
  • work relationships
  • teamwork
  • positive
  • supportive
  • work environment
  • personal relationships
  • collaboration
  • communication
  • stress
  • well-being
  • work-life balance
  • personal time
  • boundaries
  • conflicts
  • burnout
  • professional
  • personal identities
What to do next:
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