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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts illustrate how many degrees granted in different fields at the National University in the 1990, 2000, and 2010.

The pie charts compare the proportions of degrees in
medicine
Use synonyms
,
law
Use synonyms
,
business
Use synonyms
, and
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
 at the National University in 1990, 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
 increased steadily and became the largest field,
while
Linking Words
business
Use synonyms
 decreased over time.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 remained quite stable
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
law
Use synonyms
 showed only small changes. In 1990,
business
Use synonyms
 and
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
 were the biggest fields, each making up about
Use synonyms
one third
Use the right word
one-third
show examples
 of all degrees.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 accounted for
one
Use synonyms
 quarter,
while
Linking Words
law
Use synonyms
 was the smallest, at only 15%. By 2000,
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
increased
Verb problem
had increased
show examples
 to 40%, or
two fifths
Use the right word
two-fifths
show examples
 of the total.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
business
Use synonyms
 fell to
Use synonyms
one fifth
Use the right word
one-fifth
show examples
.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 rose slightly to 30%,
while
Linking Words
law
Use synonyms
 dropped to just
Use synonyms
one tenth
Use the right word
one-tenth
show examples
, which was the lowest figure among all subjects. In 2010,
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
 grew
further
Linking Words
 to 45%, which was almost half of all degrees.
However
Linking Words
,
business
Use synonyms
 continued to decline to 15%,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was only about
one
Use synonyms
 third of
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 returned to
one
Use synonyms
 quarter, the same as in 1990,
while
Linking Words
law
Use synonyms
 increased again to 15%. (20 min/ 168 words)

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words medicine, law, business, computer, science, one with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pie chart
  • degree
  • field of study
  • granted
  • National University
  • decade
  • trend
  • popularity
  • dominant
  • least popular
  • analysis
  • technological advances
  • economic changes
  • gender distribution
  • correlation
  • job market
  • prediction
  • future trends
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