Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialize with others. What problems do children face when going online without parental supervision? How can these problems be solved?

In
todays
Check wording
today's
show examples
world
Use synonyms
,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
has become the most indispensable device.
However
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, it is argued that youngsters used to spend more time on there without adult supervision . Not only that, they
being
Verb problem
are being
show examples
used to
socialize
Change the spelling
socialise
show examples
and interact with others .
Hence
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,
due to
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this
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activity
Punctuation problem
,
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young children have faced a
lots
Fix the agreement mistake
lot
show examples
of issues which we will discuss in
further
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paragraph
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paragraphs
show examples
and will unfold some
preventives
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preventive
show examples
to
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measures to
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get rid of
this
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huge threat .
To begin
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with,because of
this
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internet facility
kids
Punctuation problem
, kids
show examples
try to spend more time with computers. Because
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
its
Use the right word
it's
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having a huge
atttraction
Correct your spelling
attraction
, and
userfriendliness
Correct your spelling
user-friendliness
. Not only that, youngsters have
capability
Correct article usage
the capability
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to access more applications through
internet
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the internet
show examples
, like
facebook
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Facebook
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,
instagram
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Instagram
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,
tiktok
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TikTok
show examples
,
ect
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etc
. Here these applications
are
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apply
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consist
with
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of
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some variations , like chatting, texting and
upload
Wrong verb form
uploading
show examples
profle
Correct your spelling
profile
pictures.
Moreover
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, they can
requests
Wrong verb form
request
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to
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from
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each
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
who is using these applications.
Hence
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, without
there
Use the right word
their
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knowledge and
due to
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their lack of experience about the
Use synonyms
world
Punctuation problem
world,
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they might
caught
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be caught
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
some cheaters or
some
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apply
show examples
scammers .
This
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must be creating terrible issues amongst parents . As an example, some research has
been
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apply
show examples
revealed there are 30% of money scammers
has
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have
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been arrested in the
world
Use synonyms
because of cyber scams or
bullyings
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bullying
show examples
.
Moreover
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,
some
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
certain youngsters have
addicted
Verb problem
become addicted
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to
access
Wrong verb form
accessing
show examples
some
non
Rephrase
apply
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appropriate
Use the right word
inappropriate
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sites and websites .
Cosequently
Correct your spelling
Consequently
,
this
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trend
is
Verb problem
does
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not
possessing
Verb problem
have
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a positive impact
to
Change preposition
on
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the new
world
Use synonyms
and
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will
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absolutely create a major disaster among
Correct article usage
the
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young generation.
However
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, to mitigate
this
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problem, the best possible way that I suggest, the responsible
cairer
Correct your spelling
caregiver
should
be interfere
Wrong verb form
intervene
show examples
and have to have appropriate supervision
about
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of
show examples
them and their activities. To stand up
with
Change preposition
to
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this
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,
while
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access
Replace the word
accessing
show examples
different
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
and
sites
Punctuation problem
sites,
show examples
there must be some regulations ,and should be imposed some condition regarding the age limits.
In addition
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, there should be a considerable
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
to pay for these uploads.
To conclude
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, without supervision of adolescents absolutely
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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a huge threat to the future.
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Hence
Punctuation problem
Hence,
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there must be standard conditions and appropriate behaviour to produce a
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
generation
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the future
world
Use synonyms
.

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Task response
Give a clear plan. State your view and answer both parts. Make one main idea per paragraph.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the flow clear. Use join words to move from one idea to next. Keep order in short steps.
Language accuracy
Fix grammar and spelling. Use simple, short sentences. Check punctuation.
Content
Use a real example or fact to back idea. Keep it close to the topic.
idea
Some ideas show the danger of the web for kids.
structure
There is a start of a plan to stop bad acts.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • unsupervised access
  • parental supervision
  • inappropriate content
  • online bullying
  • harassment
  • strangers
  • mental health
  • well-being
  • addiction
  • privacy
  • security
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