IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an approriate use of government money?

Technology is improving each year,
even
Correct word choice
and even
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 each month the modern cities
establishing
Verb problem
are establishing
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 new things. Every
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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know
Correct subject-verb agreement
knows
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 that
Chineese
Correct your spelling
Chinese
 people are living 10
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 after us. They are even better than all of
technology
Correct article usage
the technology
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asset
Fix the agreement mistake
assets
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 from Europe. So
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
every government should care
their
Change preposition
for their
show examples
 own
citizens
Punctuation problem
citizens,
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include
Replace the word
including
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 transportation or
build
Replace the word
building
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school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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 for
students
Punctuation problem
students,
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make
Wrong verb form
making
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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public
work
Fix the agreement mistake
works
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 that will
paid
Verb problem
be paid
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by
Change preposition
for by
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 so on.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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 there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 and limited
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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 that are wasting the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
themselves
Punctuation problem
themselves,
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although
Linking Words
 it is unacceptable.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the other hand
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 can deal with private companies
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
Correct article usage
a partneship
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partneship
Correct your spelling
partnership
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
other
Punctuation problem
other,
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Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 can
also
Linking Words
 lead to
improve
Replace the word
the improvement
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 of
countries
Check wording
the country's
show examples
 development

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Task response
Your answer lacks a clear view. Start with a short line that says what you think. Then add two or three points to support it.
Coherence and cohesion
Make a plan. Use two or three short paragraphs. Each paragraph should have one main idea and a small example.
Coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like and, but, also, for example. Use a few phrases to show flow.
Language
Check simple spelling and grammar. The essay has wrong words like Chineese. Fix these.
Content
There is an effort to talk about what the government can do.
Content
The idea of private work with firms is touched.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Efficiency
  • Cost savings
  • Automation
  • Manpower
  • Processes
  • Savings
  • Transparency
  • Accountability
  • Digital systems
  • Transactions
  • Corruption
  • Public trust
  • E-governance
  • Citizen satisfaction
  • Economic growth
  • High-tech ecosystem
  • Innovation
  • Job creation
  • Initial expenditures
  • Long-term benefits
  • Digital divide
  • Underserved areas
What to do next:
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