IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Advertisements are becoming more and more common in our everyday life. Is ti positive or negative development? How should they be punished?

Advertisements are becoming more common in our daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 since
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been a reason
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 earn money easily. But it has both advantages and disadvantages depending on which way we
watching
Verb problem
are watching
show examples
 the
advertisement
Use synonyms
 or
we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
giving the
advertisement
Use synonyms
. Let's talk about
clearly
Correct pronoun usage
it clearly
show examples
. The adventages of
advertisement
Use synonyms
,for one thing if you are business owner you give an advertisements to a TV shows, usefull sites, or social media which is now being craze at
this
Linking Words
 point, every person has got an smartphone and social media, and
while
Linking Words
 they are scrolling reels or shorts your
advertisement
Use synonyms
 can face their page and they may have interest to your product adn your products can sold easier and for another if you are not a business owner you can take
advertisement
Use synonyms
 and earn money from it.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the disadvantages of
Use synonyms
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 that
while
Linking Words
 you are watching your
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
favourite film or a TV show, the
advertisement
Use synonyms
 can bother you from the start of the show to the end or
while
Linking Words
 you
playing
Verb problem
are playing
show examples
game
Correct article usage
a game
show examples
.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 there is a big problem with
Use synonyms
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
advertisement
Punctuation problem
advertisement,
show examples
is
Use the right word
in
show examples
 that nowadays advertisements of
casino
Fix the agreement mistake
casinos
show examples
 and sites like that are spreading
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 every site and social media
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 tend
people
Verb problem
to lead people
show examples
 to
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
. In conclusion,
advertisemets
Correct your spelling
advertisements
 have both negative and positive
sites
Use the right word
sides
show examples
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 it depends on which way you are watching or giving
Use synonyms
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
. In
present
Correct article usage
the present
show examples
 time
trusting
Punctuation problem
, trusting
show examples
 whatever
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
you
saw
Wrong verb form
see
show examples
 can
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
 a big problem
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 you can earn money with it or increase your business's monthly profit
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 giving
Use synonyms
advertisement
Correct article usage
an advertisement
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

language
Fix spelling and grammar so the read is easier.
structure
Make a simple plan before you write: intro with your view, then two body parts for pros and cons, and a short conclusion.
cohesion
Use small word links to show ideas go with each other, like 'and', 'but', 'also', 'however'.
content
Give one or two clear examples to back up your points.
content
The essay tries to show both sides of the issue.
structure
There is a simple form of intro, body, and conclusion.
content
There are useful ideas about how ads can help or harm.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: