Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree?

It is
argured
Correct your spelling
argued
that
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
must make younger students
as
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into
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
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good specialists and workers, rather than reveal them as a
person
Use synonyms
.
Althought
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Although
,
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apply
show examples
children must
boosting
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boost
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their skills for
light
Correct word choice
a bright
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future,
i
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I
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think
to grow
Wrong verb form
growing
show examples
personally is better. On the one hand, teenagers must
to
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apply
show examples
show themself like a creative and independent
person
Use synonyms
. Because
,
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apply
show examples
costumers
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customers
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initially
Linking Words
see them as a
person
Use synonyms
, and they always take your leadership skills, independent thinking into account.And schools can impact on children, and make them more open.
In addition
Linking Words
, all companies need an
intellegent
Correct your spelling
intelligent
employee to influence the future.
Furthemore
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Furthermore
, now a lot of companies
appropriate
Verb problem
appreciate
show examples
their employees if they imagine a special value, ensuring
a
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apply
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high salaries.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, for some people it is a good way if you already
had
Wrong verb form
have
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a job with
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
average salary. Because
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
a large part of them do not like to reflect
about
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on
show examples
personal growth.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
make a pattern
person
Use synonyms
for work. "You have to not be
an
Correct article usage
a
show examples
burden for other people, and listen
all
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to all
show examples
tasks that you must
to
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apply
show examples
do", in many schools talk similar information
for
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to
show examples
children
,
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apply
show examples
on
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in
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preventive conversations. In conclusion,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
would say schools must
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
teach students how
reveal
Verb problem
to reveal
show examples
themself and up their levels and some industries, and help them to get
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
important opportunities for personal growth, rather than
make
Verb problem
instil
show examples
a pattern
thinking
Change preposition
of thinking
show examples
.

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task
Make your main view clear from the start and keep it in all ideas.
content
Add one or two strong ideas and give a simple example for each.
structure
Use four clear parts: intro, two body paras, and a short conclusion.
coherence
Use easy linking words to join ideas, like first, also, but, so.
content
You show you know both sides.
structure
The essay ends with a clear conclusion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • social responsibility
  • foundational knowledge
  • career success
  • economic contribution
  • personal development
  • critical thinking
  • creativity
  • emotional intelligence
  • balanced education
  • community well-being
  • holistic education
  • academic and personal growth
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