IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Many people use social media every day. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

There is a belief that a considerable
amount
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number
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 of
people
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 use social
media
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 on a daily basis .
While
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this
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 development offers several notable
advantages
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advantages,
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 it
also
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 has certain
disadvanatges
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disadvantages
.
Overall
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 ,
Even
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even
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 though there are clear
benefits
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benefits,
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 I firmly believe that
disadvantges
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disadvantages
 outweigh the advantages. One significant advantage of social
media
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 is that
,
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apply
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It
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it
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 helps to chat with different
people
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 around the
world
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.
This
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stims
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stems
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 from the fact that social
media
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 , particularly
apps
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apps,
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 help
to
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apply
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people
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 communicate worldwide.
As a
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result
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result,
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people
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 become more aware of cultures and traditions .
For
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instance
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instance,
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 recently I have uploaded an app called HelloTalk
and
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, and
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 there I got
a
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apply
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plenty of acquaintances
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,
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and they were all from different parts of the
world
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 .
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Therefore
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Therefore,
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this
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 demonstrates that social
media
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 connects
people
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 around the
world
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.
However
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 , the key
disadvanatge
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disadvantage
 of social
media
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 is that it has a negative
affect
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effect
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 on
overall
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well being
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well-being
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 and health.
This
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 is largely because it frequently forces
people
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 to compare their
life
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lives
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 with
an
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apply
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unrealistic pictures.
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Consequently
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Consequently,
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this
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 led to
the
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apply
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mental
problem
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problems
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 like depression
,
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.
show examples
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Moreover
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Moreover,
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people
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that
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who
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 spend
extend
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extensive
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 hours
in
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on
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 social
media
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 tend to be
dissatisfaied
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dissatisfied
by
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with
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 their lives.
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Thus
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Thus,
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this
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 highlights the potential drawbacks that cannot be overlooked. In
conclusion
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conclusion,
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while
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usage
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the usage
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 of social
media
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 provides a sense of connectivity to the
world
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 . The drawbacks significantly outweigh the advantages.
Overall
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, I firmly believe that
disadvantages
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the disadvantages
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 are more substantial .

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grammar
Fix many spelling and form errors, for example disadvanatges, dissatisfaied, extend hours. Use clear, correct forms.
coherence
Make ideas clear and use one good example linked to each point.
coherence
Use linking words to show flow between ideas (first, also, but, for example).
structure
Keep one main idea in each paragraph. Start with a clear topic sentence, then explain.
vocabulary
Use simple words. Do not use hard words. Prefer common words.
content-clarity
The essay has a clear aim and says if living with social media is good or bad.
examples
There is a real example (HelloTalk) to show a point.
structure
The essay uses a basic plan: intro, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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