IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe animals should not be used for human purposes, while others argue that such use is necessary for progress. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The use of
animals
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 for human purposes remains a highly controversial issue that presents a significant moral dilemma.
While
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 some people argue that
animals
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 should never be exploited for human benefit
due to
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 ethical concerns and cruelty to
animals
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, others maintain that certain uses are necessary for scientific and societal progress.
This
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 essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own view. On the one hand, opponents of animal use emphasise the importance of animal welfare and argue that practices
such
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 as animal testing and captivity cause unnecessary suffering. They contend that
animals
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 have the right to live in their natural habitats rather than artificial environments designed for human convenience.
Furthermore
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, with the development of alternatives to animal testing, many believe that scientific research can continue without harming
animals
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.
Similarly
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, a growing number of people advocate for plant-based diets and veganism in order to reduce environmental impact and biodiversity loss.
On the other hand
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, supporters argue that some uses of
animals
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 are a necessary evil that contributes to medical breakthroughs and wildlife conservation.
For example
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, animal testing is often required for regulatory approval of new medicines,
while
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 captive breeding programmes help protect endangered species from extinction. Without
such
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 measures, many species might disappear entirely, and progress in healthcare could slow significantly. In conclusion,
although
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 the exploitation of
animals
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 raises serious ethical concerns, I believe that limited use may be justified if it prioritises animal welfare and minimises suffering. Greater public awareness and stricter regulations are essential to ensure a balance between human needs and the protection of
animals
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.

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task response
State your view clearly in the first paragraph and keep it the guide for the whole essay.
task response
Add more clear and real examples. Use facts or strong examples that show why one side is true.
task response
Explain how each side shows progress and welfare, and how rules or limits affect them.
coherence
Link ideas with good sign posts; each paragraph has one main idea and some links to the next.
vocabulary
Use simple words and short lines; keep to common words so easy to read.
task response
Balanced view with your own strong view shown.
coherence
Clear form: intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence
Good use of on the one hand / on the other hand links.
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