Art and music are considered some of the fundamental elements of the society. Do you think art and music still have a place in today's modern world of technology? Should children spend more time learning art and music at school?

It is believed that creativity and
music
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is
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are
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a main component of our community. I strongly believe craft and
music
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carries
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carry
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a good
repuation
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reputation
nowadays despite
of
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apply
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digitalization
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digitalisation
show examples
. School
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children's
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children
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must pay equal attention to all the subjects.
Music
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and art are
respected highly
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highly respected
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in
digital
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the digital
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era.
Although
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there is a very
advancement is
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advanced
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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technolgy
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technology
, people have different hobbies. But
music
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and craft
is
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apply
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have
its
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their
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own importance, because it soothes your soul.
Morever
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Moreover
,
children
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follows
Correct subject-verb agreement
follow
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many famous singers and artists, and they are their
ideals
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idols
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.
This
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industry gives overnight fame, which today's generation wants.
For example
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:
sidhu
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Sidhu
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mooslewala
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Moosewala
is a
punjabi
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Punjabi
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singer who got fame overnight and
may
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many
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of
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apply
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young
children
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follows
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follow
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him. In the
schools
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schools,
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all the subjects are equally important. Science, language,
math
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and math
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are important for future
career
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careers
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and jobs,
while
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subjects like physical, arts and
music
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are important to
nurish
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nurture
their talent. Every student
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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their own area of interest, we never know who
going
Verb problem
is going
show examples
to become a great artist in the
furture
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future
.
Linking Words
Therefore
Punctuation problem
Therefore,
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if
music
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and craft
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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not a part of their
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academic
acedamic
Punctuation problem
acedamic,
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it is very hard to
recoginize
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recognise
their skills.
In
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For
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instance, it is
proved
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proven
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that the famous artist
they
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apply
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purse
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pursue
show examples
their talent from childhood and early
recoginization
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recognition
helps them to improve
further
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. In conclusion, creativity and
music
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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a basic component of our society.
Children
Use synonyms
should be taught these areas in
the
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apply
show examples
school.
However
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,
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
curriculum should be very holistic.

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structure
Plan your answer. Use intro, body, and a short closing.
task
State your view clearly in the intro and restate it in the conclusion.
coherence
Make points clear in each paragraph. Stick to one idea per paragraph.
coherence
Use simple linking words to show order and relation.
grammar
Check spelling and grammar like plural forms and verb tense.
content
Give a concrete example and explain it.
content
The writer shows a good idea that art and music should be in school.
structure
The essay has an overall view on the topic.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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