IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, many people have to work for longer hours, asd they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can the employers do to make their lives easier?

In recent years, most
of
Change preposition
apply
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workers
Use synonyms
feels
Correct subject-verb agreement
feel
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 burnt out because of overtime. The cause of
this
Linking Words
 issue is short staff
and
Correct word choice
apply
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. Management can
offers
Wrong verb form
offer
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 their
workers
Use synonyms
 a flexible schedule and
sufficient
Correct article usage
a sufficient
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 number of
vocations
Use the right word
vacations
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. The reason
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 for which staff
work
Use synonyms
 extra
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 is less staffing. Some job needs special knowledge and training to
work
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 For
such
Linking Words
 jobs
Punctuation problem
, its
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its
Use the right word
it's
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 hard to get qualified.
Therefore
Linking Words
, less number of people
available
Verb problem
are available
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 to
work
Use synonyms
 in that sector. To become a doctor special course and practicals are needed. It is not easy to achieve.
For instance
Linking Words
, publications
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
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 that the number of nurses in
US
Correct article usage
the US
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 is less than the demand. Some nurses have to
double
Verb problem
work double
show examples
 shifts, and by
second
Correct article usage
the second
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 year of their
job
Add a comma
job,
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 they started feeling tired and
stresssful
Correct your spelling
stressed
. To
addresss
Correct your spelling
address
 the issue of stress among
workers
Use synonyms
,
authorties
Correct your spelling
authorities
 should give them
schedule
Correct article usage
a schedule
show examples
according to
Linking Words
 their choice and
offers
Correct subject-verb agreement
offer
show examples
 enough leaves to relax. If staff get the opportunity to
work
Use synonyms
 as per their choice of shifts, it will be easy for them. They can plan things ahead.
For example
Linking Words
, they can plan their daily activities
accordingly
Linking Words
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
workers
Use synonyms
 should get enough
time
Use synonyms
 to go on
vocations
Use the right word
vacations
show examples
. If
labour
Use the right word
labourers
show examples
 spend
time
Use synonyms
 on holidays, they can get
time
Use synonyms
 to relax. It will help them to ventilate their emotions and feelings.
This
Linking Words
 way they can fresh themselves from wrong thoughts and feelings.
To conclude
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
,
In
Fix capitalization
in
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modern
Correct article usage
the modern
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 era,
labour
Use the right word
labourers
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 extra
time
Use synonyms
 and
feels
Correct subject-verb agreement
feel
show examples
 more
exhuasted
Correct your spelling
exhausted
. The cause of
this
Linking Words
 is less staffing
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 can
addressed
Verb problem
be addressed
show examples
 by providing them schedule
according to
Linking Words
 them and
also
Linking Words
 by giving them
time
Use synonyms
 to relax
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.

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structure
Make clear the two tasks: causes and solutions. Structure: intro, 2 body parts (causes, solutions), conclusion.
grammar
Fix grammar and spell words. Use simple form and watch plural 'staff' not 'staffs'.
cohesion
Use linking words to show flow between ideas: 'first', 'also', 'but', and 'therefore'.
content
Provide one or two clear examples that show the problem, and explain how the suggestion can help.
planning
Plan before writing. Make a short plan with 4-6 lines before you write.
content
The essay talks about real issues like staff shortage and long hours.
example
There is an example about nurses in the US to show lack of staff.
structure
There is a sense of order with intro, body parts and a conclusion.
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