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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

many countries are promoting space tourism as a new industry, does advantages of this development outweigh disadvantages

In recent years,
space
Use synonyms
tourism
Use synonyms
 has started to gain popularity. A large number of countries are focusing on
growth
Correct article usage
the growth
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 and expansion of
space
Use synonyms
tourism
Use synonyms
 as a new industry.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the benefits
as well as
Linking Words
 the drawbacks of
this
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. Even though there might be
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 downsides to
this
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in
Punctuation problem
, in
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 my opinion,
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 believe there are more advantageous points. On the one hand, development of a new type of
tourism
Use synonyms
 will
sky rocket
Use the right word
skyrocket
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 the economy of the country
promoting
Punctuation problem
, promoting
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 it because a lot of
people
Use synonyms
 will find it fascinating and they might plan to visit that country.
For example
Linking Words
, if the USA starts to spread news about travelling to
space
Use synonyms
 as a tourist,
people
Use synonyms
 from around the globe will want to visit it and spend their money on
this
Linking Words
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is a
briliant
Correct your spelling
brilliant
 idea to boost the economy.
Furthermore
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, individuals will
also
Linking Words
 get a
once in a lifetime
Use the right word
once-in-a-lifetime
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 experience of being outside of Earth
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 will make their lives fulfilling.
On the other hand
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, there can be
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 disadvantageous points to it because it can lead to differences between different classes of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
Space
Use synonyms
tourism
Use synonyms
 will definitely be expensive
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 only the rich
people
Use synonyms
 will be able to afford it
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 can create a disparity between those who can afford it and those who cannot.
For instance
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, a
low income
Use the right word
low-income
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 worker will not be able to afford a trip to
space
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
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 might develop feelings of jealousy and bitterness towards the
people
Use synonyms
 earning more than that person
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 is not healthy for a society to function properly. In conclusion, even though there are drawbacks of
tourism
Use synonyms
 in
space
Use synonyms
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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 social disparity, there are definitely more benefits from it,
such
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 as economic growth and
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 experience. I firmly believe there are more positive sides to
this
Linking Words
 than negative.

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content
Build more facts and real proof for your idea. Talk more on both sides and be clear about your view.
structure
Make a clear plan. One idea per paragraph. Intro, two body parts, and a short ending.
coherence
Link ideas well. Use words like also, but, and so to show flow.
structure
Clear view on the topic.
structure
A simple plan with intro and ending.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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