IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island) over the same period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables compare how New York's
overall
Linking Words
population
Use synonyms
 evolve throughout 1800-2000 and how the five districts (
Manhattan
Use synonyms
, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island) contribute to the
overall
Linking Words
 metro's residents. In general, people living in New York
Verb problem
has increase
show examples
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
 significantly over the 2 centuries. Even though
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Manhattan
Use synonyms
's residents
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 in actual number, its figure of
city's
Correct article usage
the city's
show examples
population
Use synonyms
dip
Wrong verb form
dipped
show examples
 steeply as the other regions expanded. In 1800, a group of
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Manhattan
Use synonyms
 stood
significantly
Rephrase
apply
show examples
at 60.5 thousand, representing 76% metro's figure. By 2000, it grew considerably to 1.5 billion, yet it declined to19% in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of
city's
Correct article usage
the city's
show examples
overall
Linking Words
population
Use synonyms
. At the same time, the combined number of
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
 outer districts had merely 18.7 thousand, contributing nearly a quarter of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
. It changed
progresively
Correct your spelling
progressively
 to 6.4 billion in 200 years, comprising the highest percentage of 81%.
This
Linking Words
 statistical data
suggest
Correct subject-verb agreement
suggests
show examples
 that the
population
Use synonyms
 growth
concentrated
Verb problem
is concentrated
show examples
 in areas outside
Manhattan
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, manhattan with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • people
  • city
  • five
  • district
  • grow
  • growth
  • rise
  • increase
  • increase
  • rise
  • fall
  • decline
  • high
  • low
  • big
  • large
  • small
  • more
  • less
  • over time
  • by year
  • in total
  • compare
  • compared with
  • whereas
  • trend
  • pattern
  • overall
  • feature
  • note
  • point
  • difference
  • lead
  • catch up
  • late
  • early
  • century
  • decade
  • period
  • 2000
  • 1800
  • 1900
  • continuous
  • steady
  • rapid
  • fast
  • slow
  • periods
  • numbers
  • data
  • report
  • describe
  • summarise
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