IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below gives information about the UK's ageing population in 1985 and makes predictions for 2035. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart gives a background on the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 in the five counties that are part of the
UK
Use synonyms
 who
aged
Verb problem
were aged
show examples
 more than 65 years old in 1985 and gives a future estimation of how many will age by 2035.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Wales
Use synonyms
 has the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of aged
population
Use synonyms
 in both years,
while
Linking Words
Use synonyms
Nother
Correct your spelling
Northern
Ireland
Use synonyms
 has the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
 in 1985. When it comes to 2035, there is
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
 stable
percentage
Use synonyms
 between
England
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
Nother
Correct your spelling
Northern
Ireland
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
. The biggest impact is the fact that
Use synonyms
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 will
have a longer life generally
Correct word order
generally have a longer life expectancy
show examples
 in the future than in the past. In
1985
Punctuation problem
1985,
show examples
it can be seen
Correct word order
apply
show examples
a
more
Rephrase
apply
show examples
lower rate
in
Verb problem
was seen in
show examples
 general among all the countries. There is a slight rise from
England
Use synonyms
 to
Wales
Use synonyms
,
meanwhile
Punctuation problem
meanwhile,
show examples
 from
Wales
Use synonyms
 until Nothern
Ireland
Use synonyms
 it has a
slow
Correct word choice
slight
show examples
 decrease of almost five
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
During
Change preposition
In
show examples
 1985,
England
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 plateaued
out
Change preposition
at
show examples
 very similar percentages of 15
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Use synonyms
Nother
Correct your spelling
Northern
Ireland
Use synonyms
 shows the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
.  In the future, all five countries will experience a dramatic increase in the aged
population
Use synonyms
.
England
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
Nother
Correct your spelling
Northern
Ireland
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 will remain very similar between 20 and 25
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Wales
Use synonyms
 will be slightly
high
Replace the word
higher
 than Scotland by
aproximately
Correct your spelling
approximately
 2 points. 
Finally
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 huge
different
Replace the word
difference
 between both periods of time appeared
due to
Linking Words
 the new medical facilities that emerged, and the new inventions that
appeard
Correct your spelling
appeared
 to
elongate
Verb problem
prolong
show examples
human's lifes
Check wording
human life
show examples
.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, population, uk, wales, nother, ireland, england with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "gives" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Ageing population
  • Demographics
  • Percentage
  • Increase/Decrease
  • Predictions
  • Proportion
  • Region/Regional
  • Statistics
  • Gradual change
  • Elderly
  • Life expectancy
  • Healthcare
  • Birth rate
  • Comparative analysis
  • Trend
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