Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

cause-anxiety, stress
form
Use the right word
from
show examples
high-pressure working, distraction from technology devices solution-take medicine, go for treatment, reduce using mobiles, In
this
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modern world, the difficulty of insufficient sleep has been a widely debated issue. In
this
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essay, I will first discuss the specific damage caused by
this
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terrible problem,
then
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explain the measures that can be taken by
people
Use synonyms
to solve
this
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issue. The primary cause of the lack of sleep is diverse distractions. Nowadays, there are many sources of distractions that can impact the quality of sleep; to be more specific, modern technologies
such
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as mobile phones, video game players and tablets, which contribute to a more convenient life,
however
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, they
also
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cause some detrimental effects.
For instance
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, most
people
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use their mobile phones to browse social media
while
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lying on their beds;
this
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trend is inevitable because
this
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habit has become a daily routine which helps
people
Use synonyms
relax. To address
this
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issue, individuals can try some different ways of relaxing.
For example
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, doing some exercises after work,
such
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as running or swimming, because the physical activities not only enhance fitness, but
also
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reduce stress;
in other words
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, exercising consumes the redundant energy from the body, which enables us to easily fall asleep throughout the night.
As a result
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,
people
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are able to improve the quality of sleep just by changing a daily habit
instead
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of taking medicines or getting treatments. In conclusion,
although
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most
people
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realise the importance of sleep, it is hard to change existing habits
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
therefore
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, I believe that it is beneficial for family members to encourage each other to do it together.

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task response
Answer both questions more clearly. You wrote more about causes, but the task asks about problems of not sleeping and solutions.
coherence and cohesion
Write one full body paragraph about problems, and one full body paragraph about solutions.
task response
Use ideas that match the question. For problems, you can write about stress, poor health, accidents, and weak work or study results.
coherence and cohesion
Make each main point clear, then add a short example to support it.
coherence and cohesion
Some links are good, but a few parts do not connect well. Check words like 'however', 'for instance', and 'as a result' and use them only when the meaning fits.
task response
Your conclusion is clear, but it adds a new idea about family help. It is better to sum up your main points only.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has basic paragraphing, and the order is easy to follow.
task response
You give a solution about less phone use and exercise, which is relevant to the topic.
task response
You use examples to explain your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Insomnia
  • Sleep deprivation
  • Sleep disorders
  • Sleep quality
  • Fatigue
  • Exhaustion
  • Restless
  • Restorative sleep
  • REM sleep
  • Circadian rhythm
  • Sleep hygiene
  • Napping
  • Sleep duration
  • Melatonin
  • Sleep-inducing
  • Drowsiness
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Obstructive sleep apnea
  • Snoring
  • Sleepwalking
  • Sleep talking
  • Shift work
  • Sleeping pills
  • Sleep aid
  • Relaxation techniques
  • Meditation
  • Deep breathing
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