IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The cham barer shows ares nonsen prices in five difen its bateen 1990 and

The bar chart gives information about
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 change in typical house prices in New York,
Madrid
Use synonyms
, Tokyo,
Frankfurt
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
London
Correct word choice
and London
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 throughout the
period
Use synonyms
 from 1990 to 2002 compared with 1989.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
figures
Use synonyms
 for New York,
Madrid
Use synonyms
, Tokyo and
London
Use synonyms
 showed an increasing trend,
while
Linking Words
 the figure for
Frankfurt
Use synonyms
 declined over the
period
Use synonyms
. The
figures
Use synonyms
 for four countries illustrated an upward
trends
Fix the agreement mistake
trend
show examples
. The number of New York and
London
Use synonyms
 grew the most. They started
for
Change preposition
at
show examples
 about -5% for
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and -8% for
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
.
Afterwards
Add a comma
Afterwards,
show examples
 during the
period
Use synonyms
 1996 and 2002, the
figures
Use synonyms
 significantly rose, 5% for
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and 12% for
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
. In the second place
stayed
Verb problem
came
show examples
Madrid
Use synonyms
 and Tokyo. The
figures
Use synonyms
 for
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 two
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
 started at 2% and -8% in 1990-1995,
then
Linking Words
slight
Replace the word
slightly
 rose to 4% and -5% respectively.
By
Linking Words
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
 the
figures
Use synonyms
 for
Frankfurt
Use synonyms
 showed
downward
Correct article usage
a downward
show examples
 trend. They started from about 3%,
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was
a slight
Replace the word
slightly
 higher
the
Correct word choice
than the
show examples
 indicators for
Madrid
Use synonyms
,
subsequently
Linking Words
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
minimal
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
decreased
to
Rephrase
slightly to
show examples
 2% in
Use synonyms
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
 1996-2002. It is interesting to note that the
figures
Use synonyms
 for
London
Use synonyms
 increased the most, more
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
 three
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
 the number of
Frankfurt
Use synonyms
 decreased the least,
only
Change preposition
by only
show examples
 for 1%.

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task response
Write a clearer overview. Say the main changes in one short part.
task response
Use the right words for charts. Say 'cities' not 'countries', and 'house prices' not 'number'.
task response
Check data statements carefully. Some trends are not fully clear or exact.
coherence and cohesion
Group ideas better. Put cities with similar change in one body part and explain them in the same way.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a simple and correct way, like 'while', 'by contrast', 'then', 'overall'.
coherence and cohesion
Make each sentence easy to follow. Some sentences now are hard to understand because of grammar and word order.
task response
You gave an overview, which is very important in Task 1.
task response
You used some numbers from the chart to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has clear paragraphs for the main parts.
coherence and cohesion
You tried to compare cities, not only list data.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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