IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You hired a car from a company, while. While you were driving you had a small accident. Write a letter to the company to explain it. In your letter: •when and where you hired it •describe how the accident happened •what kind of action did you take after the accident

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to inform you about a recent accident that happened near Surrey in your company's car.
To begin
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 with, I hired
this
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 car from the "King George" branch yesterday at 9 am. I had a communication with one of your representative "Mr Kishore". He handled all the documentation for the rental agreement. The collision happened at "180th st 20th avenue"
I
Punctuation problem
. I
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was going towards
north
Correct article usage
the north
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 direction
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 on the other side of
road
Correct article usage
the road
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, there was a "
Black suv
Correct your spelling
black SUV
" going towards the south. Suddenly, a kid came in front of the SUV, which lead to driver bringing his automobile to the opposite side of the road.
Due to
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 which, I had to press
hard
Correct article usage
the hard
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 break. Unfortunately, the automobile behind me was not attentive on the road
,
Punctuation problem
;
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therefore
Linking Words
, it crashed into my vehicle from behind.
Furthermore
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, I have contacted "911" and
descibed
Correct your spelling
described
 the whole incident to them.
Additionally
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, I have provided the dash cam recording to them.I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
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 you could provide me with
further
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 steps to resolve
this
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 matter. I would be grateful for your prompt reply. Yours faithfully Saransh Sharma

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task response
Add a little more clear detail about the damage and what the police said.
coherence and cohesion
Use easy linking words like first, then, and finally.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each sentence short and clear to make the story easy to follow.
task response
Use a more formal style, for example avoid too many quote marks.
task response
You answered all three parts of the task.
coherence and cohesion
The letter has a clear opening, body, and closing.
task response
Your tone is polite and suitable for a formal letter.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one main idea.
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