IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

I wouldn't say it is directly a
possitive
Correct your spelling
positive
 or negative development, but my thought is
it
Correct word choice
that it
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 depends on how the
government
Use synonyms
 of the country plans the way one country would be. Some countries allow
people
Use synonyms
 to own spaces and allow
people
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 to leave it as a family heritage, in that case, the owner of the house will have to take a resposibility of their owning stuffs or spaces
including
Punctuation problem
, including
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 their home area.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 can reduce its workload to some extent.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, taking care of the land is considered to be one of the
government
Use synonyms
's responsibilities.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason why they do not allow
people
Use synonyms
 to own any areas,
intead
Correct your spelling
instead
, they only let
people
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to
Wrong verb form
apply
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rent for a very long time, so that they can always take care
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
 land
esier
Correct your spelling
more easily
.
Also
Linking Words
, after the lease expires, the
government
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 can
utilize
Change the spelling
utilise
show examples
 those areas to
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 fullest potential. In conclusion, I think there is no
possitive
Correct your spelling
positive
 and negative between these two ways as
it
Fix the agreement mistake
they
show examples
 both have different pros and cons.

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task response
Answer both parts more clearly. Say why people want a home, and then give a clear view: more positive or more negative.
coherence cohesion
Use one main idea for each body part. This will make your writing easier to follow.
task response
Add simple real examples. For example, a family may want a home for safety or for their children in the future.
coherence cohesion
Link ideas with clear words like first, also, however, and in conclusion.
task response
Explain each point a little more. Some ideas are good, but they stop too soon.
task response
You give a clear ending with your own view.
task response
You show both sides of the topic, which helps the reader see your thinking.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a basic beginning, middle, and end.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Homeownership
  • Property ladder
  • Real estate
  • Mortgage
  • Equity
  • Inflation hedge
  • Stability
  • Long-term investment
  • Asset
  • Liability
  • Housing market
  • Tenure
  • Down payment
  • Property taxes
  • Maintenance costs
What to do next:
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