The pie charts show the average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisions where relevant . Vu Huyen

The pie charts show the average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisions where relevant . Vu Huyen
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The pie charts show the average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisions where relevant . Vu Huyen
The following pie charts compare the average household expenditures in
Japan
Use synonyms
and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
cost
Use synonyms
of household expenditures in these two countries was relatively high. First of all, the percentage of expenses on housing in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
was the highest at 34%,
while
Linking Words
in
Japan
Use synonyms
, the percentage of spending on the same matter was only at 21%.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
Japan
Use synonyms
's transport
cost
Use synonyms
was 20%, which was 10% more than that of
Use synonyms
Malaysia’s
Check wording
Malaysia
show examples
.
Next,
Linking Words
the food
cost
Use synonyms
in these two countries was not much different — the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
cost
Use synonyms
of food in
Japan
Use synonyms
and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
were at 24% and at 27%, respectively. In terms of
Health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
expenditures,
this
Linking Words
was the lowest
cost
Use synonyms
that people in
Japan
Use synonyms
and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
spent on — it was at 6% and 3%, respectively.
Finally
Linking Words
, spending on other goods and services in
Japan
Use synonyms
was the highest at 29%,
while
Linking Words
Malaysian people only spent 26% on
this
Linking Words
matter.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words japan, malaysia, cost with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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