IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

some students take one year off between finishing school and going to university in order to travel or to work. what are the advantages and disadvantages?

Nowadays, many
students
Use synonyms
 take one
year
Use synonyms
 gap to go to work or go to travel. There are advantages and
disadvantage
Check wording
disadvantages
show examples
 from
this
Linking Words
 trend, which will be discussed in
this
Linking Words
 essay. On the one hand,
students
Use synonyms
 can have more experience before entering a university. That’s because they only concentrated on studying
while
Linking Words
 they were in school. They didn’t have much time to think about themselves
what
Correct word choice
and what
show examples
 they want to be. During the gap
year
Use synonyms
, they could discover themselves and prepare for their future
while
Linking Words
 they are working and
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 can work
related
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their future career
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it helps to find their direction to set career goals.
Traveling
Change the spelling
Travelling
show examples
 allows
students
Use synonyms
 to be relaxed from stress as they
got
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 a lot of stress to get better scores, which
go
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to greater universities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, taking a
year
Use synonyms
 off may
leads
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
 to
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time and
money
Use synonyms
. Since people
lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
 in a competitive society, it
makes for
Verb problem
delays
show examples
students
Use synonyms
to be delayed to get
Change preposition
from getting
show examples
 jobs in the future.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 haven’t learned how to spend their
money
Use synonyms
 yet, so it would affect their spending habits.
For example
Linking Words
, they may spend all
Use synonyms
money
Correct article usage
the money
show examples
 that they earned
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their tuition fees.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, business owners can take advantage of
students
Use synonyms
 because they don’t have much experience. There are advantages to
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
 a
year
Use synonyms
 off, which provides
students
Use synonyms
 with experience from work and travel and freedom.
However
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
 disadvantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 it, leading
negative
Change preposition
to negative
show examples
 habits of spending
money
Use synonyms
 and procrastination.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more full way. Say clearly why a gap year is good and why it is bad.
coherence and cohesion
Use one clear main idea in each body part, then add support for it.
task response
Give a more specific example, not only a general statement.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, and as a result.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence is easy to follow and stays on the same point.
task response
You answered the question and wrote about both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
Some ideas are relevant, such as work experience, stress relief, and money problems.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gap year
  • Academic momentum
  • Practical experience
  • Financial pressures
  • Interim period
  • Soft skills
  • Maturity
  • Independence
  • Career exploration
  • Re-adjustment
  • Social setbacks
  • Informed decision-making
What to do next:
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