IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

There is no doubt that globalisation has benefited the world by bringing together people, business and nations. People who criticise it stand in the way of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#doubt #globalisation #world #people #business #nations #criticise #progress
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In today's age, globalisation has certainly opened
gate's
Change noun form
gates
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 that welcome new opportunities, growth and income, but at the same time it is argued by some individuals that
this
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 could
also
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 have some drawbacks. I believe
,
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apply
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 an increase in globalisation could lead to problems as well.
Firstly
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, economic growth has partially been dependent on the global markets.
For instance
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, large companies often put a lot of investment
on
Change preposition
in
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 foreign land in order to increase profits.
Additionally
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, people love the idea of working
outisde
Correct your spelling
outside
home
Correct article usage
the home
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 as it allows them to learn new cultures and gain good experience. Internationalization
also
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 ensures countries
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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build mutual respect between each other.
For example
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, the United States and Canada trade huge
amount
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amounts
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 of dairy products which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 in regard to boost their economy.
Hence
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, it is fair to admit that bringing people together can help nations in many ways.
On the other hand
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, there are quite a few drawbacks that
need's
Correct your spelling
need
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 to be given attention. Nowadays, unemployment has risen in many countries
since
Change preposition
in
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 the
last
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 decade.
Moreover
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, local residents are unable to find jobs
due to
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 the increase in
immigrant
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the immigrant
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 population.
This
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 directly hinders opportunities for
local
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the local
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 public to work and make a living for themselves.
Secondly
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, in terms of business and trade, it
also
Linking Words
 involves political risk. Several nations have ties
due to
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 business and other factors
such
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 as trade, investment, loans, etc. There is always a risk of conflict between two or more parties and a small misjudgement or disagreement could be a valid reason for controversies. It could possibly allow loss of business and war if things
go
Verb problem
get
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 worse.
To conclude
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,
global
Correct article usage
a global
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 economy is an essential way to grow and make wealth. On one side, there are
plently
Correct your spelling
plenty
reasons
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of reasons
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 why there should be limitations to ensure local welfare and growth.
Although
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, In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 the disadvantages outweigh the merits.
Submitted by lavinramnani8 on

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coherence cohesion
In order to enhance clarity and coherence, make sure that each paragraph logically flows from the previous one. Try using linking words or phrases more effectively to connect your ideas.
task achievement
Expand on your main ideas by providing more detailed and specific examples. While the examples you provided are relevant, they could be further developed to provide deeper insight.
task achievement
Make sure your viewpoints are consistently clear and comprehensive throughout your essay. Strengthening your arguments by providing deeper analysis could enhance task achievement.
language use
Be precise with language use and ensure grammatical accuracy. Avoid small errors like misplacing apostrophes and ensure uniformity in verb usage for increased clarity.
task achievement
You present both advantages and disadvantages of globalization which shows balanced consideration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion which frames your argument effectively.
language use
The essay demonstrates good use of vocabulary to convey ideas, displaying a good range.
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