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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects.Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like science and Techology are more important than History. Discuss both views and give your opinion

People differ in their view of the importance of studying
history
Use synonyms
. Some
believes
Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
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 that
history
Use synonyms
 is
essential
Correct article usage
an essential
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 subject,
whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 others think that more focus should be
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other courses like science and technology. In my opinion, I think that historical education is essential for two main reasons
:
Punctuation problem
:
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 knowledge of
heratige
Correct your spelling
heritage
 and achieving a
rabid
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rapid
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development
Use synonyms
. First of all, by studying the life of one's country is prime for preserving some traditions and
customes
Correct your spelling
customs
.
For example
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, in
Saudia
Correct your spelling
Saudi
 Arabia, people started getting more
intersted
Correct your spelling
interested
 in their
history
Use synonyms
 as they celebrate and bring back some of the historical
clothings
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clothing
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 and cultural traditions
in
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on
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 days like the Foundation Day.
Also
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, other countries can learn from the experiences of other countries as they study their
history
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.
For instance
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, everyone
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
 is more
awar
Correct your spelling
aware
 of the long lasting effect of
Nural Pomp
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Nuclear Power
 after the
crizes
Correct your spelling
crises
 of Horishema and it is up today negative impact on Japan
.
Rephrase
today.
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Second,
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studying the
development
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 of different sciences and technologies
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 useful for current
development
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 in the field.
On
Use the right word
One
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 example is in the field of medicine in which the study of abndamics play a primary role in creating
indivisuals
Correct your spelling
individuals'
 knowledge of the need
of taking
Wrong verb form
to take
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 vaccines.
Moreover
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, focusing on the technological aspect, computer
scientests
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scientists
 and engineers have to
knoe
Correct your spelling
know
 the historical background of Artificial
intelegince
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Intelligence
 (AI)
development
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 to get a comprehensive understanding of how
does
Verb problem
apply
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it
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
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. In other
word
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words
show examples
, the past is a foundational part of todays acievements.
To sum up
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, some people may argue that studying past achievements and events are waste of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time as they see that the effort should be on studying today's achievements in different fields.
However
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, I believe that
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our past
define
Correct subject-verb agreement
defines
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 who we are and
push
Correct subject-verb agreement
pushes
show examples
 us
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 future achievements.

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task response
Answer both sides more clearly. You say your view well, but the other side needs more full detail.
coherence and cohesion
Make your main idea in each body paragraph very clear at the start.
task response
Use examples that are easy to understand and explain them more.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, and because.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence fits the main point of the paragraph.
task response
You give your opinion clearly in the introduction and the end.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear shape: introduction, two body parts, and conclusion.
task response
You use examples to support your ideas.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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