IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart illustrates the proportion of monthly
changes
Use synonyms
 in the prices of
copper
Use synonyms
, nickel, and
zinc
Use synonyms
 in
a specific
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
year
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2014.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of monthly
changes
Use synonyms
 in the
price
Use synonyms
 of
copper
Use synonyms
 was highest in beginning of the
year
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
Zinc
Use synonyms
 recorded
for
Change preposition
the
show examples
 monthly
price
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
changes in
Change preposition
Changes at
show examples
 the end of the
year
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 highest .In terms of
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
, a significant
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Copper
Use synonyms
 was recorded in January, at approximately 6%.
However
Linking Words
, the figures for nickel and
zinc
Use synonyms
 were lower, at 2% and 1% respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the proportion
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
zinc
Use synonyms
 increased from 1% to 3% between January and February, before decreasing to -1% in June. Between July and September, the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of monthly
changes
Use synonyms
 in sales remained
stable
Punctuation problem
stable,
show examples
then
Linking Words
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 experienced a
steeply increased
Replace the word
steep increase
 and reached its peak at 2 percent in the end of the
year
Use synonyms
.For the remaining
price
Use synonyms
changes
Use synonyms
 , the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Copper
Use synonyms
 plunged over
6 month
Correct determiner usage
a 6-month
show examples
 period, at (-3)
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
then
Linking Words
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 increased
steady
Rephrase
steadily
show examples
 and reached 1percent in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
December.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
price
Use synonyms
 of nickel showed a gradual increase of about 0.5% throughout the period.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words changes, copper, zinc, year, percentage, price with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • volatile
  • stability
  • peak
  • trough
  • increment
  • decrement
  • steady
  • gradual
  • sharp
  • increase
  • decrease
  • month-on-month
  • average monthly change
  • commodity
  • benchmark
  • trend
  • precipitous
  • plateau
  • significant
  • marginal
  • surge
  • dip
  • plummet
  • soar
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