More and more people are working from home rather than going to the workplace. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Today, there is an ongoing debate over whether mobile working benefits people more than working in an
office
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. From my perspective, I tend to believe that
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home
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the home
show examples
office
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is more beneficial. The main benefit is that
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home
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a home
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office
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can improve work performance.
This
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is because,
according to
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research, working in a quiet and familiar environment supports deep thinking and creativity,
thus
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boosting efficiency.
In addition
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,
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home
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a home
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office
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can strengthen employee commitment. With flexible schedules, people can better balance work and family responsibilities.
This
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makes employees feel trusted and motivates them to work more conscientiously.
For example
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, international companies
such
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as Cisco and Google adopted
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home
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the home
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office
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more than a decade ago. Their people-oriented approach has not only raised job satisfaction but
also
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strengthened team cohesion.
Besides
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,
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home
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a home
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office
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helps reduce companies’ operating costs. Businesses can either build offices far from city centres at lower cost, or optimise their
office
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space in central business districts to save on rent, utilities and other overheads.
However
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,
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home
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the home
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office
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also
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has drawbacks. It may reduce
communication
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effectiveness. Many tasks require cross-departmental cooperation and instant
communication
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. Most projects need team members to hold group discussions and even exchange conflicting ideas to ensure smooth progress It need team members to hold group discussions and even debate different ideas to ensure smooth progress. Online discussions are rarely as efficient as face-to-face
communication
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, and network issues can
further
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affect
communication
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quality. In conclusion, despite the weaknesses of
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home
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the home
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office
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Linking Words
such
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, such
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as less effective
communication
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, I am still convinced that it is better than working in an
office
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because it can raise productivity, strengthen employee commitment, and cut business expenses.

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task response
For task response: your answer is clear, but you should explain the bad side a little more. Now the good side is stronger than the bad side.
task response
For task response: your example about Cisco and Google is useful, but one more direct example of home work in daily life would make your point stronger.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: your essay has a clear order, but there is one sentence repeated in the disadvantages part. Fix this because it breaks the flow.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: use linking words with care. You already use words like 'besides' and 'however' well, but you can add one or two more simple links to show cause and result.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: in the second body paragraph, explain how the cost point links to the question more clearly, so the reader can see why this advantage matters.
task response
For task response: you answer the question directly and clearly say that the advantages are stronger.
task response
For task response: your main ideas are relevant and stay on the topic all the way.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: your essay has a clear intro, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: each paragraph has one main idea, so the essay is easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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