IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people believe that money is the best gift to give teenagers, while others disagree. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving money as a gift? What is your opinion?

in
Fix capitalization
In
show examples
 recent years,an
onging
Correct your spelling
ongoing
 most
dabet
Correct your spelling
diabetic
 people think about ismony.Some people consider that
money
Use synonyms
 is the best
gifts
Fix the agreement mistake
gift
show examples
 to give
yoth
Correct your spelling
you
,other arger that disagree about it.
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 will explain both sides
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 will give my own opinion. on one other hand,
humen
Correct your spelling
humans
 consider that
money
Use synonyms
 is sutible gift to give
teenagers
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 is
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
 they need to spend
money
Use synonyms
 for what they need and build
finanical
Correct your spelling
financial
 skills and how can mange thier cash.
Linking Words
for
Fix capitalization
For
show examples
 example,when
teneegers
Correct your spelling
teenagers
 have
meeting
Correct article usage
a meeting
show examples
 with
friend
Check wording
friends
show examples
 or
having
Wrong verb form
have
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 a movie time ,they feel
happay
Correct your spelling
happy
 when they have
money
Use synonyms
 to make a way to be
comfort
Replace the word
comfortable
. AS result, the plan to spen mony lead them to become
confedent
Correct your spelling
confident
 and find a strenth points
as a
Change preposition
over the
show examples
 long term
of time
Check wording
apply
show examples
.
Linking Words
on
Fix capitalization
On
show examples
 the other hand,
money
Use synonyms
 as a gift for
teenagers
Use synonyms
 is the most
issue
Correct word choice
important issue
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days ,
that becose
Correct word choice
because
show examples
teenagers
Use synonyms
 are
attract
Wrong verb form
attracted
show examples
 to try all things as
mch
Correct your spelling
much
 as they see.
Friendshis
Correct your spelling
Friends
 often
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
has a
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 bad habits or
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
spend
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 harmful ways .As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
,
money
Use synonyms
reflex
Verb problem
reflects
show examples
 a disadvantage that
effective
Verb problem
is effective
show examples
 dramtaclly as a short term
of time
Check wording
apply
show examples
.
in conclousine
Correct your spelling
In conclusion
,
money
Use synonyms
 is the most
need
Replace the word
needed
 in our life .I believe that
money
Use synonyms
 should not
given
Verb problem
be given
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
teenagers
Use synonyms
 as
gift
Correct article usage
a gift
show examples
 ,the best way to spend
thier
Correct your spelling
their
money
Use synonyms
 under pareants systen and be in the role.

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task response
Answer all parts of the question more clearly. Write one clear good point, one clear bad point, and then your opinion.
task response
Make your main ideas easy to understand. Some ideas are there, but they are hard to follow because the meaning is not always clear.
task response
Use a more clear example. Your example about going out with friends is on topic, but it needs more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a basic shape: start, two body parts, and end. This is good, but make each part link more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words well: First, Also, For example, However, In the end. Do not use too many strange phrases.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in each paragraph. Some lines move too fast from one idea to another.
task response
You answered both sides and gave your opinion in the end.
task response
You included an example, which helps your answer.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You used paragraphs to separate ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial responsibility
  • budget
  • save
  • informed spending decisions
  • personal preferences
  • practical and efficient
  • unwanted or inappropriate gifts
  • impersonal
  • emotional value
  • thoughtfulness
  • personal consideration
  • wise financial decisions
  • frivolously
  • lasting memories and experiences
  • educational courses
  • hobby-related equipment
  • long-lasting positive impact
  • fostering interests and skills
What to do next:
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