IELTS Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, there are two different opinions regarding

Music

Use synonyms

in our society. On the one hand, some

people

Use synonyms

regard

music

Use synonyms

as only

just

Correct determiner usage

show examples

entertainment

tools

Fix the agreement mistake

tool

show examples

to enjoy. They might

seems

Wrong verb form

seem

show examples

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

they believe

music

Use synonyms

doesn't affect

people

Use synonyms

's lives in any

routes

Check wording

way

show examples

. So they just sing a song when they hang out together or listen musics when they feel bored

Punctuation problem

, or

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maybe they need to focus on their

works

Check wording

work

show examples

On the other hand

Linking Words

, Others don't believe like that. They give

music

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

a more

show examples

heavy

roles

Fix the agreement mistake

role

show examples

in our society. Frankly

speaking

Add a comma

speaking,

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I agree with

here

Use the right word

her

show examples

Through

Change preposition

Throughout

show examples

human's

Check wording

human

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history, art has

taken

Verb problem

played

show examples

a huge role in almost all social parts.

Music

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is one of the

art

Fix the agreement mistake

arts

show examples

. If we look into

vary

Replace the word

various

aspects that

music

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has, we couldn't think that

music

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is just

simple

Correct article usage

a simple

show examples

form of entertainment.

For example

Linking Words

BTS

Use synonyms

very

Correct article usage

a very

show examples

famous idol group in

Korea

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and

Linking Words

also

Verb problem

has also

show examples

became to get

Verb problem

gained

show examples

fame over the world. Through

BTS

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people

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in the world started to concentrate on South

Korea

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. It was not easy to know

regarding

Change preposition

about

show examples

Korea

Use synonyms

before

BTS

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. So

Kroean goverments

Correct your spelling

Korean governments

work

together with

Linking Words

BTS

Use synonyms

when they promote gorvernment's thoughts to the world or even just when they want to advertise South

Korea

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as it is. Like

this

Linking Words

Music

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could be one of

nation's

Correct article usage

the nation's

show examples

politic

Replace the word

political

tools.

Additionally

Linking Words

, in

mordern

Correct your spelling

modern

society,

people

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who suffer from depression

oftenly

Correct your spelling

often

use

musics

Check wording

music

show examples

to let their

sterress

Correct your spelling

stress

get released

Change preposition

apply

show examples

as a

therapy

Check wording

form of therapy

show examples

Overally

Correct your spelling

Overall

, I would like to say

music

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is not just a simple

entertainment's janre

Correct your spelling

entertainment genre

but

also

Linking Words

a deeper and wider part of life. Beyond the form of

music

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, if we could consider the possibility of

music

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, I believe we can expand our lives

happier

Verb problem

to be happier

show examples

and wiser than before.

summer0408

Apr 15, 2026

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task response

Answer both sides in a more equal way. You write more about the second view than the first view.

task response

State your opinion in a very clear sentence in the introduction and again in the conclusion.

task response

Add one more clear example for the first view, not only for your own view.

coherence and cohesion

Use one main idea for each paragraph and explain it step by step.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear linking words like 'Firstly', 'For example', 'However', and 'In conclusion'.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure each sentence connects well to the next one. Some parts now feel sudden or unclear.

task response

You discuss both views and give your own opinion.

task response

You use a real example about BTS, and it is relevant to your main idea.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

The overall message is clear: you think music has a bigger role in society.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

281 words

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IELTS Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, think that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Environmental protection is the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree?